Rhiannon's Story
by cjh4ever
Summary: Following Ianto's death, Rhiannon tells Gwen about their childhood and how it shaped the man he became. Told primarily from Rhiannon's point of view with linking explanations. Rated T for odd bad language only.
1. Pedal Car

_This is the story of the relationship between Ianto and his older sister, Rhiannon, told in a series of snapshots of their lives. Each chapter is linked by a discussion/explanation between Rhiannon and Gwen Cooper_.

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**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

The usual crowd of teenage boys were lounging on the solitary open green space as Gwen Cooper drove into the Cromwell Estate. She was pretty sure they never went to school and that she'd find them there, doing nothing, whatever time of day she came around. That was the lot of kids on this estate; poor schooling with unemployment awaiting them unless they were particularly self-motivated and managed to get out. Gwen had come across kids like it while she was with the police, petty thieves and muggers for the most part who increasingly carried knives and even the occasional gun. They either graduated to more serious crimes later and spent the rest of their lives in and out of prison or they opted for dead-end jobs and raised a brood of children that would follow in their footsteps. It was all such a waste, she thought, briefly rubbing her stomach which – disappointingly – was still flat.

Gwen pulled up outside number 25 and turned off the engine. Getting out, she locked the door and activated the alarm, remembered the loss of the SUV and hoped her car would be there when she came back out. The front door opened as she drew near and Johnny stood in the opening. He was a big lad and she faltered for a moment, hoping this was not going to descend into a slanging match, but he smiled and stepped aside.

"I'll just go and tell those sods not to mess with your motor," he said, heading for the teenaged youths. "She's in the lounge."

"Hello," called Gwen, from the hallway before pushing open the door into the one open-plan living room. "It's me, Gwen."

The room was in the same chaos she had seen before. Piles of laundry lay around, either waiting to be washed or possibly to be ironed. The sink and drainer were covered with dirty dishes – the breakfast ones as far as Gwen could see – and the counter top was covered with toaster, kettle and other appliances as well as bills, junk mail, magazines and kids' pictures and other precious items. Boxes of leaflets waiting to be folded and put in their envelopes were on the dining table and a small pink dressing gown – Mica's – was hanging off the back of a chair. Shoes of various sizes littered the floor near the far wall, trainers mostly. The television was on, showing a daytime soap, but the sound was mercifully turned down to a whisper. The three piece suite was rumpled and cushions were higgledy-piggledy and dented. A jumper was draped across the back of the sofa where sat the only occupant of the room.

Rhiannon looked up at her visitor. She had been lost in memories and it took her a moment to remember the face and put a name to it. "Oh, Gwen, hello. Want a cup of tea?" She put aside the album and stood up. "Christ, just look at this place. Bloody tip!" Reaching for the jumper she folded it tidily then stood holding it, her face crumpling.

"It's all right, sweetheart, I understand." Gwen hugged the woman she had known for just a few days. "Can I do anything to help?" she asked, releasing her.

"Could help with the washing up," said Rhiannon, replacing the jumper on the back of the sofa. "Nothing to drink out of otherwise!" She managed a smile and moved to the kitchen.

The two women spent half an hour clearing up. Gwen tackled the backlog of washing up while Rhiannon sorted the clothes and put a load on to wash. Those to be ironed she folded and put to one side intending to tackle them later before she cleared away some of the mess on the counters. This shared activity helped bridge the gap between the two women and they were comfortable with one another when they took their tea and sat on the sofa. With the television off and the rest of the house empty – Johnny had stayed outside – it was peaceful and they sipped the drinks quietly for a moment or two.

They had met three times in total, all in the last ten days. The first had been when Gwen had come with the awful news of Ianto's death and they'd been caught up in saving David and Mica, Rhiannon's children, and the rest of the kids who had been in the house at the time. Three days later, Gwen had returned to check the family was coping and to talk about funeral arrangements and then, just two days ago, had been the funeral itself. Not the best of times to forge a connection let alone a friendship. Gwen was here now at Rhiannon's request but still felt an outsider and ill at ease.

"How you feeling?" asked Rhiannon. "Still sick?"

"Yeah, every morning and most of the rest of the day too." Gwen grinned, glad she had this physical reminder of her pregnancy no matter how ill it made her feel.

"I had it too. Worse with Mica, funnily enough. But it's worth it."

"I know." Neither had to explain, both felt the need to protect their children – born and unborn – from all dangers, terrestrial and alien.

"I was looking through this." Rhiannon had the photograph album on her knee. "Not got many old snaps but there's a few. I wanted to show you, to explain about Ianto." Her voice wavered and she took a moment to recover her composure. "Why he …"

"We all do it, Rhiannon, we all make our backgrounds sound better than they really were." Gwen placed a hand on the other woman's arm and squeezed briefly. "I know I did."

"But you grew out of it. Like me, like everyone else. Only Ianto … kept doing it. Even when he was a man he couldn't accept what our family had been like. He was ashamed of us."

"No! I don't believe that!" asserted Gwen, putting her mug on the floor beside her. "He loved you."

Rhiannon laughed shortly. "You really don't … didn't know him." She paused. "I suppose he did love us, in his way. But we rarely saw him. Once, maybe twice a year. It was six months before I knew he was back in Cardiff! If he'd really cared he'd have called me at least."

Gwen bit her lip and resisted the urge to make excuses. Platitudes weren't appropriate and would be insulting. Instead she asked, "Why was he like that?"

"Who knows? Probably our tad. He was … unhappy in so many ways and made us kids suffer too." Rhiannon sighed. "Want to see some baby pictures? I've got one of Ianto."

"Course I do!" Gwen grinned.

"Here he is." Rhiannon opened the album and pointed to a faded colour photograph. It showed a baby in a blue romper suit and hand-knitted cardigan and booties lying on a chair. Beside him and leaning over him was a young girl. "And that's me. I was three and I really didn't want a brother, that's why I'm scowling." She smiled at the memory.

"He was gorgeous." Baby Ianto was staring in the direction of the camera and his solemn expression was very similar to one Gwen remembered well. "He had beautiful eyes even then."

"Took after Mam. I got Tad's brown ones." She turned a page. "This is him when's he a bit older, must have been five or thereabouts. I know it was just before he started school."

The photograph showed Ianto sitting in a old-fashioned pedal car grinning at the camera. The toy car was red but paint flaked from the wings and it had a dent in the roof. Regardless of these deficiencies, the boy's grin and the way he held himself simply oozed pride in his possession.

Gwen picked up her mug and took a sip while still looking at the photograph. "I bet he washed it every opportunity he could get. Kept it spick and span."

"He did. Until I destroyed it." Rhiannon remembered the day very well. It had been a hot day in the summer …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: Pedal Car, 1987_

The sun was shining and it was the middle of the holidays. It should have been a happy day for Rhiannon Jones but instead of being able to play with her best friend Megan she had to watch her little brother. At that moment she hated him more than she'd hated anything in her seven years. On their own, the two girls would have been able to roam about the estate and explore the wasteland by the railway line but with Ianto to look after they had to stay in the garden.

"It's not so bad, Rhi," said Megan, trying to calm down her friend. "Let's play schools."

"It's our holidays, what do we want to play schools for?"

"I'm going to school after the holidays," piped up Ianto. He was dressed in immaculate blue shorts and T-shirt with matching blue socks and blue trimmed trainers. His hair was as smoothed down as he could get it. Curly hair was difficult to keep tidy and he wished and wished for straight hair but it never changed. "I'm five."

"Shut up!" snapped his sister. "Play with your cars. Over there." She pointed to a patch of bare earth near the fence.

She watched him go. That was the only good thing about him, he did as he was told. Rhiannon felt her anger building and ran off down to the end of the garden – barely four metres away – and then round and round in a large circle. If she didn't run she'd scream. This was always happening to her. She got lumbered with Ianto all the time now her mam was working mornings at Asda. It wasn't fair. Megan joined in the running. She caught her friend's hand and they pretended they were flying. If they tried hard enough, maybe they'd be able to fly away from this place to somewhere really exciting, like London.

The morning passed, as all mornings do, and Rhiannon's mood brightened. It was difficult to be angry when she was free of school and the studies she didn't understand. The day was all hers, to do with – almost – as she pleased. The garden was confining but there was enough room to run around. Megan had a good imagination, something her friend lacked, and the two girls were soon playing an elaborate game of princesses locked up in a castle with handsome princes coming to rescue them. They were lying on the grass, hands folded neatly across their chests as all good princesses do when they're waiting for their princes, when a shadow fell over Rhiannon.

"Are you dead?" asked Ianto, standing by his sister.

"No I'm not flipping dead! Go away!" She heard his sudden intake of breath and looked up at him from one half opened eye. He would tell, she knew it.

"You said a rude word." His scandalised tone was an exact mirror of their Auntie Muriel's, a crabby spinster who lived in Swansea and who disliked Rhiannon and everything she did.

"What if I did? You just keep your mouth shut, Ianto Jones, you hear me?" She sat up quickly and grabbed his arm, giving him a Chinese burn just as she'd learnt at school. He yelped and started to cry but she continued to twist her hands round on his arm.

"Let him go, Rhi," implored Megan, also sitting up and growing anxious as the boy's cries increased in volume.

"Not until he promises not to tell. Do you promise, Ianto?" She relaxed the pressure on his arm slightly.

"Yes," he wailed. "Please stop."

Rhiannon released him and he stood where he was, crying great tears as he held his sore arm. He gazed at her and she suddenly felt guilty for hurting him. It had been a mean trick. But he was such an irritating boy, even now she could feel her irritation levels rising as he refused to go away, just stood looking at her reproachfully. She didn't like the way he made her feel bad and so she pushed him away, not hard, just enough to get him to move and to stop gazing at her with his watery blue eyes.

"Go and play. Leave us alone." He stumbled backwards, regained his balance and turned away.

Rhiannon and Megan resumed their game but it wasn't the same. Besides, lying on the grass was boring after a while. The two girls decided to get onto the flat roof of the Jones' kitchen extension. Sitting up there they could see across half a dozen gardens and watch what people were doing. Rhiannon's mam called it spying and had forbidden it but she wasn't here and anyway the two girls liked the idea of being spies. To get onto the roof they had to stand on the top of Ianto's pedal car – one of his prized possessions – and then swing up using the fence that divided the garden from the Grants' next door. It was the neighbours' fence, put up after Rhiannon and her friends had kicked one too many balls into Mrs Grant's prize dahlias. Getting the pedal car meant taking it out of the shed at the bottom of the garden but that was the work of a moment.

Ianto, still holding his arm and sitting on the back doorstep, watched. When he saw his beloved pedal car being wheeled out he knew what Rhiannon planned and rushed to stop her. "No! You'll bend it again." His sister's weight had dented the roof of the cab and, while his tad had tried to put it right, the damage could still be seen.

"Get out of the way." Rhiannon left the car to Megan and held onto the boy. "You want one of those on your other arm?" she demanded.

He was in tears again. "No. Please, Rhi." He was crying again, not understanding her need to destroy everything he owned.

She was nearly swayed. In some corner of her heart she loved her little brother, it was just that he was a nuisance. And he cried too much and was a goody-goody, never doing anything naughty. "Leave off, Ianto. We need it."

"Come on, Rhi!" called Megan, in place and waiting. She knew better than to go up on the roof first, Rhiannon always had to be the leader.

The two girls positioned the pedal car just right and then Rhiannon climbed on top. The already weakened metal of the cab roof gave way under her weight and the girl tumbled through with a cry. Her leg was gashed on the exposed metal and blood poured from the wound. Megan screamed and threw her hands up in horror, rooted to the spot.

"Stop your row," snarled Rhiannon getting over her first shock. She gingerly pulled herself out of the remains of the car and surveyed her damaged leg. The blood was still coming out of the wound and the sight of it made her feel faint. She sat down abruptly.

Megan had stopped screaming but the sight of the jagged wound frightened her. She was a timid girl and decided that discretion was the better part of valour. "I'm going home," she announced, and disappeared down the side of the house. She left in the nick of time.

The back door opened and Huw Jones appeared, home early from his shift at Debenhams. He was hot and tired after walking from the bus stop and in no mood for his daughter's misbehaviour. "What's all this?" he demanded, standing over the girl. He took in the ruined pedal car and its position. "You climbing on the roof again? Will you never learn, girl?" He caught her arm and pulled her up roughly.

Huw Jones had an uncertain temper at the best of times and Rhiannon knew to tread warily around him. She got the worst of his anger, not Ianto; being older she got into more scrapes. She was too young to realise that her tad saw her unwillingness to conform as defiance and so often got a clout round the ear as a result.

"It was my fault, Tad," piped up Ianto. He came to stand beside Rhiannon, his gaze direct and innocent despite the evidence of his earlier tears. "She only went up to get my ball back." He held up the small red and white ball as evidence. "I asked her to do it. I'm sorry, Rhi." He turned to his sister and took her free hand.

"Stupid bloody kids!" He shook Rhiannon by the arm he was still holding. "Get indoors, both of you. And don't think you'll be getting another pedal car, boy. It's your fault it's ruined and I'm not wasting more money on you."

That night, when she was supposed to be getting ready for bed, Rhiannon crept into her brother's small bedroom where he had been confined all afternoon. Their tad had insisted on the punishment and their mam had gone along with it, unwilling to stand up to him. Ianto was in bed but not asleep. Rhiannon sat on the bed favouring her bandaged leg.

"Why did you do it? Why did you take the blame?" she asked. The question had been bugging her for hours.

"'Cause he'd have hit you."

"But you've lost your pedal car. And you've been stuck up here all afternoon," she persisted, unable to understand.

Ianto smiled at her, a smile of pure joy. "I like being here. I've been playing with my soldiers." He looked across at the mismatched group of toy soldiers lined up on the chest of drawers. Some were large others small, all were battered and most were second hand, passed down from an older cousin, but to Ianto they were the Coldstream and Grenadier Guards combined.

Rhiannon sat pondering her brother. He was weird. How could anyone want to be indoors on such a sunny day? Why wasn't he angry she'd broken his pedal car? Why had he taken the blame for her? Such selfless behaviour was new to her and totally alien to her own nature. She heard her mam come out of the kitchen on her way upstairs and knew she had to get back to her own room.

"Thanks," she muttered, touching his arm briefly where it was still sore for her earlier assault. "Sorry I did that." Impulsively she bent and kissed it.

Her mam's steps were almost at the stairs so Rhiannon scooted into her room and hastily dragged off her clothes. She was unusually quiet as her mam supervised as she washed her hands and face and brushed her teeth. Rhiannon Jones had a lot to think about.

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_My thanks to Orion Lyonesse for her help in brainstorming ideas for this story; sorry I kept you up so late!. More chapters coming soon …_


	2. Swings

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"Never understood why he did that. I was horrible to him in so many ways." Rhiannon was gently running a finger over the photograph of Ianto in his pedal car. "I was jealous of him, I suppose."

"He must have been very mature for his age," said Gwen, marvelling that a five year old –and only just five at that – could be so quick-witted. Ianto had headed off a much worst punishment for both children. "The bit about his clothes sounds just like Ianto." She chuckled. "He wore a suit to work every day and what we were doing made us all pretty mucky."

Gwen had told Rhiannon a little about Torchwood and Ianto's role in it. With the Hub destroyed and Gwen the only one left in Cardiff - Jack had taken Ianto's loss badly and had spent most of the last few days in London sorting out the aftermath of the 456 with the Home Office and UNIT - it didn't seem to matter if some of the truth was told. And Rhiannon deserved to know that Ianto had died a hero.

"He must have hated that." Rhiannon smiled.

"He did!" The two women experienced a moment of shared understanding. "Got any more pictures?"

Rhiannon turned the page and Gwen laughed out loud when she saw Ianto dressed for his first day at school. He stood to attention outside a door with a backpack at his feet. Every hair was in place and his neat grey trousers and white shirt were topped off by a blue V-neck jumper. The grin nearly split his face in two.

"He really wanted a cap," said Rhiannon, joining in the laughter. "Was right put out when he found our school didn't have them."

Gwen's laughter died the more she looked at the young Ianto. She had never seen him grin like that as an adult, the most he had bestowed on her was a wry smile. Perhaps Jack had seen that grin but she was sure no other members of the Torchwood team had. A few short years, twenty or so, separated this beaming child from the reserved man he had become. What had happened to effect that change? To make him want to reinvent his past?

"You all right?" asked Rhiannon, noting her guest's serious expression.

"Yes. Just … sad that I never saw him like that. Happy. Innocent. Looking forward to a bright future." She sighed heavily. "I suppose Torchwood did that to him."

"No it didn't. He started to change not long after this was taken, when he realised that life was hard. Our life was hard."

"What do you mean?" Gwen finished her mug of tea and put it back on the floor. She concentrated on Rhiannon who was still staring at the picture. Was this upsetting her? Was it too much to talk about your dead brother when he'd only been gone such a short time? Gwen had not yet lost a close family member but after the twin loss of Owen and Toshiko she had needed to talk, to share memories. Now, with Jack missing most of the time, she only had Rhys to talk to about Ianto and it wasn't the same; her husband had barely known him. She welcomed the opportunity to talk to Rhiannon but this wasn't about Gwen and her needs. If Rhiannon didn't want to talk, if she found it too upsetting, they would stop. "If you'd rather not say, it's okay." She touched Rhiannon's arm gently.

The touch seemed to bring Rhiannon back from her reverie. "I want to tell you but … you need to know a bit about us, so you can understand. Of course, I didn't know it back then, was way too young. All I knew was that Tad was mostly angry and that Mam never crossed him." She smiled. "Sorry, I'm telling this all wrong."

"Take your time. I'm not in a rush." Gwen sat back, getting herself comfortable.

"It comes back to that tailor's shop Ianto told you about." She shook her head in wry bemusement. "It wasn't Tad's, it was his father's. A little shop in the city that did pretty well until the 1970s when no one was buying bespoke suits and if they were they went to the big chain stores. Grandtad kept the shop open too long, tried to hang on and pass it to Tad, and he went bust. Lost the lot when Tad was just seventeen. It was the biggest disappointment of Tad's life and he never got over it."

"I suppose, if he'd been expecting to take over, it would be a blow."

"Umm, but Tad let it sour him. Nothing was ever good enough after that. He carried on with his tailoring apprenticeship in the hope he'd be able to start up on his own later on but there wasn't the money, and he wasn't good enough. Ended up in Debenhams, the chain that had forced Grandtad out of business, and he hated every minute." She flicked back through the album and found the photograph she wanted. "This is him just before he got married. Look at that face, what do you see?"

Gwen leant forward and looked at the black and white shot of a tall dark-haired man in a well-cut suit. He looked about forty rather than the twenty something he would have been, definitely not a follower of fashion (Gwen has seen enough of her own parents' snaps of the time to know that). Huw Jones held himself stiffly, staring into the camera as if he was staring down an enemy. But it was his expression that arrested Gwen's attention. The features were all perfectly fine – deep set eyes above a strong nose which turned up slightly at the end and a wide mouth – if he had been smiling. Instead he was frowning, almost scowling.

"He doesn't look happy, can tell that much."

"What else? It's okay," Rhiannon went on, "say what you think, you won't hurt my feelings."

"Okay, then I would say he looks … mean. As if he's hurting and he wants everyone else to feel the same way." Gwen hoped she had not said to much. "I don't think he'd have been easy to live with."

"He was a bloody nightmare. And mean? That describes him all right." Rhiannon took a moment to compose herself. "We all used to have to watch ourselves round him, try and keep him in a good mood 'cause if he got nasty …" She stopped again.

"Did he abuse you?"

"No. Sometimes I wish he had, might have given Mam the courage to stand up to him! He was disappointed when he was young and got more and more bitter as he got older. Should never have had a family. Only did because of me; Mam got pregnant and they had to get married."

"I'm sorry."

"Family tradition, I was carrying David when I went up the aisle," said Rhiannon with a smile. "Johnny may not be everyone's choice but he's been a good father to our kids and they've never wanted for love." She set her jaw and for a moment the resemblance to the man in the photograph was marked. "We might live in a mess and not be able to give the kids everything they want but we've never hit them and we have lots of fun together."

Gwen thought back to her own cosseted childhood and promised herself a trip home soon. She and Rhys had to go anyway, to give them the news about the baby. So far they'd kept it to themselves as she was only a few weeks along, barely enough to register on the tests, but now she wanted to tell them as soon as she could. Her child was going to have the same sort of loving home as she had and never have to be wary of his or her parents.

"I was used to Tad by the time Ianto was born," went on Rhiannon. "I tried not to annoy him but I was a kid, I didn't always remember. Ianto never seemed to notice. He was a quiet boy, well behaved most of the time so he didn't get to feel Tad's hand on his backside. And Tad was happier with Ianto anyway, got a boy I suppose. That incident with the pedal car was when I realised Ianto had some idea of what went on. But he really found out a year later." She had turned more pages of the album and showed Gwen a photograph.

"Oh, his leg," said Gwen immediately. "Did your tad …" She let the thought hang in the air, not sure how to ask if Huw Jones had broken it deliberately.

"Do it on purpose? No, I don't think so." Her thoughts went to the playground and the swings …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: Swings, 1989_

At nine years old, Rhiannon Jones felt herself too old for the playground. The roundabout, slide and climbing frame were for kids much smaller than her. The swings, however, still held an attraction so she skipped along beside her tad as they walked through the residential streets to the park. Ianto, immaculate as always in jeans and a thick sweater to keep off the chill in the air, was holding Tad's hand.

"I'm going to go on the slide," said Ianto earnestly, looking up at his tad. "It's ever so high."

"Is that right?" Huw Jones smiled down at his son.

"Yes, it's almost up to the sky."

Rhiannon stopped, several paces ahead of her tad and Ianto, when the pair of them laughed. She didn't understand why her tad was so happy, why he was taking them to the park when he never had before. It was all very odd. The pair caught up with her and her tad held out a hand for her to hold. She grasped it quickly in case it was snatched away and walked along with them. A family out for a Sunday morning at the park; it was like a storybook.

The park was quite large, an acre of grass and a few trees in the middle of the housing estate. It had been created by the builders - from earth moved to level the surrounding area for housing - and crudely landscaped. The council had added the trees and small playground giving the families in the vicinity a place to walk their dogs and for children to play. During the day it was merely tatty, after dark it was dangerous. Gay men hung around under the trees waiting to link up with men of a similar bent and gangs of youths gathered in the better-lit playground drinking and taking drugs. But on this grey and chilly morning in April the only people to be seen were three young men kicking a ball around and a couple of kids on the roundabout under the bored supervision of their father.

"Here we are then," said Tad, pushing open the gate in the protective railings of the playground. He nodded briefly to the other father, a neighbour. "Off you go and play."

"The swings!" cried Rhiannon and hared off in that direction. Grabbing the nearest, she pushed it backwards then let herself go, feet out in front of her and leaning back until she was almost horizontal. On the backward swing, she pumped her legs and made the next glide forward higher than the last. This was like flying and she closed her eyes for a moment to enjoy the sensation. "Whee!" she cried in an excess of high spirits.

Across the playground, Ianto was climbing up the steps of the slide, stumbling in his haste to get to the top and to experience the thrill of the long, long descent sitting on his bottom. Rhiannon watched him come down and saw their tad waiting for him at the end, laughing when the boy came down faster than expected and almost toppled off. It was a surprising sound, her tad's laughter. Normally he was stern and miserable and told them to keep quiet. Today, and for the last couple of days, he had been smiling and happy. Swinging back and forth, getting ever higher, Rhiannon thought about this some more and decided not to be fooled into thinking he'd changed, not yet. He had never stayed happy for long in the past, she could remember that much. Glancing at the slide, she saw Ianto's face and realised he had been taken in, was assuming that Tad was going to stay like this.

With sudden resolution, Rhiannon brought the swing to a halt, almost falling in her haste to get off, scraping her shoes along the ground and scuffing the polish off. She ran across to the slide and climbed up after Ianto. If she stayed with him, was close by, she might be able to stop him being disappointed.

"Quick," she called, closing the distance between them, "or shall we go down together?"

"Together!" agreed the boy eagerly. They arranged themselves at the top – Ianto sitting between her legs and with her arms round him – and they launched themselves down screaming with delight.

"You two be careful. I'm going to go and sit on the bench," said Huw Jones, taking out his pack of cigarettes.

"Oh." Ianto stood looking after him, his bottom lip trembling.

"He only wants a ciggie. Off you go. I'll wait here for you." Rhiannon gave him a push towards the steps and he went, reluctantly and with his chin on his shoulder looking back at Tad who was on the bench talking to the other father.

The two children played on the slide before moving to the climbing frame and then the roundabout. They were the only ones at the playground now and Rhiannon would have liked to go back to the swings but Ianto was little and couldn't get going very well on them and she didn't want to have to push him. As she pushed the roundabout using her foot, she listened to Ianto's chatter about school which he loved and she didn't. When she grew tired, she stood on the platform beside the boy and let the roundabout gradually come to a halt.

"Shall we do the swings now?" asked Ianto, stepping down. "I don't mind if you want to go high. I'll watch."

She smiled at him. He was an irritating little brother but sometimes, when it was just the two of them, she didn't mind being kind to him. If any of her friends had been there, Megan for instance, she would have ignored Ianto; she wouldn't be the leader of the gang if they saw her going soft. But alone with him she didn't mind. And today was a special day as Tad was being so nice. It wouldn't last, in her head she knew that, but she could hope it would.

"All right." They ran to the swings and she helped him on and gave him a couple of pushes to get him moving. He worked his legs hard but the wrong way, pulling them back when they should be stuck out in front. He didn't seem to know how to do it right and didn't get it even when she told him. After pushing him again, she left him to it and got on the swing next to him and started. "Watch me, Ianto, do it like me."

The thrill of swinging back and forth, higher and higher, made her forget her brother and she was surprised when, on a backward swing, she saw him going quite well. Then she saw her tad pushing him and grinned. She didn't need to look out for the boy any more, she could really swing high. For the next several minutes she concentrated on nothing else, just the wind in her face and the movement of her legs and body getting her higher and higher and then … a scream. Looking down from the great height she had reached, she saw Ianto on the ground and Tad beside him.

"What is it, Tad? What's happened?" She stopped her swing as soon as she could and leapt off.

"Fool boy let go, didn't he? No sense in him at all." Huw Jones' good mood was fading fast. "Get up and stop your crying, boy."

"It hurts," wailed Ianto.

Rhiannon, who knew her brother's tears better than Tad, immediately recognised he was not faking. "Where, Ianto, where does it hurt?"

"My leg," he managed before crying even louder.

The rest of that Sunday was topsy-turvy. Tad went off to the phone box on the corner and called for an ambulance while Rhiannon stayed with Ianto. It was thrilling when the ambulance arrived with sirens blaring and Rhiannon was disappointed to be sent home to tell Mam what had happened while Ianto and Tad got to ride in it. Sunday lunch was abandoned as Mam and Rhiannon rushed to get a bus to the hospital. They all waited a long time for Ianto to be seen to and after the first thrill had worn off, Rhiannon got very bored. She sat in the waiting room with Tad, made to sit still and not be a nuisance. The happy, laughing Tad was gone and the stern one was back again. Finally, after hours and hours, Rhiannon was allowed into the ward where Ianto was going to stay overnight. While her mam and tad talked to the doctor, Rhiannon stood by the bed where her brother lay looking as pale as the sheets.

"Rhi, he pushed me off." Ianto's blue eyes were trained on hers. "He did."

"You let go," she told him, taking his hand. "You should've held on." She had not seen the accident but found it easier to believe that Ianto had fallen.

"I didn't!" he said forcefully but in a whisper, aware of his parents standing not far away. "Honest, Rhi, cross my heart." He made the sign of a cross with his free hand.

Rhiannon looked across at her parents and saw Tad glance their way. His gaze rested on the bed and a small expression of disgust crossed his face. Could he have pushed Ianto? Hurt him deliberately? He hit them, a slap around the legs or a smacked bottom when they'd been naughty, but he'd never deliberately pushed them over or anything. Rhiannon was still pondering this when Mam came to the bedside.

"Ianto, sweetheart, the doctor says you'll be fine very soon." She pushed back his hair from his forehead and allowed the boy to grasp her hand. "You have to be a brave boy and stay here tonight and then you can come home tomorrow. All right? You going to do that for me?"

"You'll stay too?" he wailed, holding onto her even tighter.

"Your mam has things to do," interrupted Tad in the tone of voice that brooked no argument. "We've missed our lunch because of all this." He waved a hand to indicate Ianto and the hospital ward.

"Please stay, Mam," cried Ianto, tears rolling down his cheeks. "Please."

Rhiannon, standing unnoticed on the other side of the bed, saw the look her mam gave her tad and knew he'd won. Mam always did what Tad said, never challenged him even when he was wrong and everyone else knew it. It had always been like that. Tad laying down the rules and the rest of them following them, too frightened of upsetting him and making him angry. Rhiannon looked at her brother who seemed so little and so young. He had to learn that this was the way things were, would always be. Wishing for it to change was useless, she knew because she'd tried for years.

"Calm down, sweetheart." Mam ran a hand through Ianto's hair and placed a kiss on his forehead. "The nurses'll look after you and I'll get everything ready for tomorrow when you get home."

They left the ward to the sound of Ianto's cries and Tad complaining about the hassle caring for him would be and the loss of Mam's wages when she took time off work. Rhiannon turned at the door and looked back to see Ianto surrounded by three nurses trying to console him. This would teach him how things were in their family.


	3. A Day Out

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"That was when Ianto realised. He was a different boy when he came home from the hospital."

"I don't understand your mam. If that was my son I wouldn't have left him alone." Gwen couldn't rein in her anger whilst aware she had no right to criticise a woman she had met only once, especially to her daughter. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

"I don't mind. It's true. I'd never leave David or Mica, not for a minute. Just shows how much under Tad's thumb she was. I didn't understand her either, not at the time, and while I do now … I can't forgive her, never will, for not standing up for us kids." Rhiannon's mouth was set in a hard line. "And for other things."

"You say Ianto changed?"

"Yeah. He lost his innocence that day. He always swore Tad pushed him off the swing. That was one of the last things he ever said to me."

Tears threatened and Rhiannon stood up abruptly and headed to the kitchen where she grabbed some tissues from the box. She stood leaning on the sink, her head bowed as she wept. That last meeting with her brother was all she had to hang on to. They had sat at a picnic table and said barely two dozen words and those about the threat to the children. If she'd known then that she'd never see him again she'd have said so much more, have hugged him and told him how much she loved him. Her one consolation was that she had helped him, given him the laptop and the car without protest – well, not much of a one - she'd not let him down at the end.

Gwen stayed on the sofa, giving the other woman some privacy, and picked up the album that had fallen to the floor. While Rhiannon wept, Gwen opened the album and looked at the photographs within, finding the one of Ianto sitting on a sofa reading a comic with his plastered leg propped up on a pouffe in front of him. Looking back at the one of him in his school uniform she marvelled at the difference a few months made. Gone was the happy, confident grin to be replaced by a mask that gave nothing away. That was the expression she knew well. Ianto had worn that one most of the time she had known him.

Movement made her look up as Rhiannon stooped to pick up the discarded tea mugs. The woman's eyes were red but she was under control again. "Want another?"

"No, thanks."

Rhiannon put the mugs on the side ready to be washed and checked on the washing machine. It still had a way to go before the cycle was complete so she left it and returned to the sofa, sitting beside Gwen. "Sorry, it just came back to me."

"No problem. If you'd rather I left …"

"No! No, I want you to know this, I want you to know Ianto." Rhiannon smiled bravely. "He'd tell me off for getting so soppy."

Gwen chuckled and handed back the album. "He was very brave. He went to face the alien without thinking of himself and what might happen to him."

"It's hard to think of him fighting aliens. He's … he was just my little brother. Always told me he was a civil servant working in a tourist office."

"He did, sometimes. But he was a lot more than that."

"Difficult to get my head round. Couldn't believe it when those men came in and searched the place. Then they were watching us, listening in. It was horrible."

"I know. My parents got the same treatment, and Rhys'." Gwen put a hand on Rhiannon's, feeling some physical contact would help. "They went after everyone close to us."

"And this Jack's? His family too?"

"Jack hasn't got any family." That was true now, thought Gwen, he had lost Alice forever.

"He's a strange one." Rhiannon had met him twice. On the day after the alien had been sent packing he'd come to the house, on his own, and introduced himself. He'd sat in this room and expressed his condolences, more bereft than her. Then they'd met again at the funeral but he'd not stayed afterwards.

"He loved Ianto, really loved him. He's very cut up about it. Blaming himself for not protecting him."

Rhiannon grinned suddenly. "Handsome bugger, can see why Ianto fell for him. Ianto sat over there, at that table," she pointed, "and told me about Jack. How he loved him. Had to drag it out of him, the silly sod. Suppose he thought I'd disapprove or something."

"No one told me either. I had my suspicions but then I came across them – half naked and kissing." Gwen grinned. "It was bloody hot!"

"I bet!" They had a moment of complete understanding, grinning at the thought of the two men in an embrace. "I'm pleased Ianto was happy. He was really cut up when that Lisa died. Not that I took to her much myself, bit hoity-toity for me."

Gwen said nothing, remembering the Cyberwoman Lisa Hallett had become.

"Still, I only met her the once. Probably shouldn't judge." Rhiannon had opened the album again and came to a page filled with photographs taken at the seaside. "It wasn't all bad, you know, when we were growing up. We had some good times too."

Gwen leant over and looked at the photographs on the page. There were four. The first showed a slightly older Rhiannon and Ianto in swimming costumes making sandcastles on a beach. The next was of Ianto, running out of the water with seaweed in his hands and a mischievous grin on his face. A blur at the side of the photograph, which she thought was probably Rhiannon, showed he was chasing someone. The third photograph was of the children with their tad kicking a ball around. The final one must have been taken by someone else as it showed the whole family - Mam, Tad, Rhiannon and Ianto – with the adults in deck chairs and the children on a blanket at their feet. All four were smiling and relaxed.

"Where was this?" asked Gwen.

"Porthcawl. Asda had a day trip there and Mam signed us up for it. We didn't get holidays, not staying away, just odd days out like this one. Tad only decided to come at the last minute but he was in a good mood and it was a lovely day. Sunny and warm for once, not that we expected it." She pointed to the last photograph. "See, Mam had brought our coats, just in case."

"I remember days like that. Never could rely on the weather."

"No. But that day Tad and Mam were sunny too, made it even more special."

"Had things got better by then?" ventured Gwen.

"A bit. We were older, weren't such a nuisance to Tad. And we'd learnt not to rile him so much. He still had his moments but as long as we did what he said we got along."

"Tell me about the day," urged Gwen, interested to hear about happier times in the Jones household.

"Not much to tell." Rhiannon's mind went back to a sunny day at the seaside …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: A Day Out, 1990_

The coach was full of kids and their parents and there was a lot of noise. The adults had wisely gathered at the front of the coach and were talking while the children filled the back seats and were kept occupied by one of the Asda managers who was also a Scout leader.

"One more time," he said, grinning at the assembled kids. "All together. _The Wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round_ …"

Rhiannon joined in the singing. She was having a wonderful time as was Ianto beside her. They had played a game spotting animals and cars, had a quiz as well as singing a number of songs. At that moment Ianto was kneeling on his seat and beating time on the back as he sang loudly, a grin on his face to match her own. The song came to an end and there were immediate calls to sing it again but the smiling man – Roy Traynor – held his hands up to quieten them.

"Enough now, kids. We're almost there. Keep a lookout for the sea."

Settling back in her seat, Rhiannon smiled; so far the day had been perfect, one to remember. The sun was shining and Mam and Tad were in a good mood. She could see them sitting up front, chatting to some of the other parents. Tad wasn't supposed to be there - it was going to be just her, Mam and Ianto - but yesterday Tad had announced he was coming too, had got time off work specially. Rhiannon's heart had sunk when he'd said that and it had spoilt the anticipation all last night and Mam had seemed disappointed too. But so far this morning he'd been like the other tads and - she had noticed this before but didn't understand why - he was better when other adults were around, less cross. Maybe it would be all right after all.

"Look, Rhi, look, it's the sea." Ianto was kneeling on the seat still, his hands and face pressed to the window.

"Budge up." She scrunched up beside him and spotted the flash of blue between high hedges and the houses that lined the road And then the houses stopped and for a couple of minutes they had an uninterrupted view down at blue sea and yellow sand before the hedge started again. "That's where we're going."

"It's going to be such fun," he said, turning to grin at her.

Rhiannon sat back in her seat, her face troubled. "We mustn't upset Tad," she began, whispering to her brother. "You understand? Don't ask for treats."

He was suddenly serious. "Yes, Rhi, I know."

The coach deposited them on the seafront and the Jones family disembarked, all of them carrying bags and coats and other necessities for the uncertain Welsh summer. Rhiannon carried the heavy bag containing their lunch and her raincoat, trudging after the others down onto the sands which were already busy with holidaymakers. After walking a little way along the beach, the family found an open space. Tad rented a couple of deckchairs and didn't even grumble about the cost. Mam spread out the blanket to mark their patch while Rhiannon stared at the sparkling sea in the distance beyond an expanse of sand and pebbles. This was to be their only day out this summer – Tad said they couldn't afford any more, couldn't really afford this one – and Rhiannon planned to make the most of it. She was at the seaside and the sun was shining; it was going to be a good day.

And it was.

When the bags were unpacked, Rhiannon had been free to play. She slipped off her dress and shoes to reveal the swimming costume she'd worn underneath and ran off, unable to stay still any longer. She reached the water and ran in, shrieking at the first chilly touch but carrying on anyway. After going in up her waist where the waves broke against her she retreated until they swirled around her knees leaving white trailers. She could taste the salt from the spray. She knew how to swim but decided not to, not yet anyway, content to splash about and watch the few braver – and older – souls who were further out.

"Rhiannon, give me your hairband or you'll lose it."

The girl turned to see her mam standing behind her. She'd removed her skirt and was now in shorts. Her trim figure and smile made her look younger than usual and Rhiannon stared at her in amazement. Was this really her mam? She said nothing as the hairband was removed.

"Tad and Ianto are making a sandcastle, want to help?"

Rhiannon looked over to where they had made camp and saw the two of them, on hands and knees, hard at work. The buckets and spades were relics of other days out, brought with them in the bags; there was never money for anything new, the old ones had to do. Rhiannon looked back at her mam and suddenly wanted to be with her, on their own, just the two of them.

"No, Mam. Let's walk, you and me. In the water." She tugged on her mam's hand and after a bit of laughter and protesting, the two of them set off along the water line; Mam walking and Rhiannon trotting along first in front and then behind.

Later they all got involved in making sandcastles before Tad went off for a swim. Rhiannon had only vague recollections of him swimming before but he seemed to be enjoying himself, larking about with the other tads and the big boys. They started a game of beach cricket after a while. Ianto didn't join them, he was busy with his sandcastle, determined to get it just right, and Rhiannon stayed to help him. She ran back and forth to get water for the moat and eventually the boy sat back on his heels, cocked his head to one side and pronounced his masterpiece finished.

"Go and try the water, Ianto," urged their mother, smiling from her place in the deckchair. She had her camera in her hands having taken a few snaps of them. "Rhiannon, go with him."

The two children raced off, through the other people who had set up little oases of possessions, and reached the sea. Rhiannon ran straight in, keen to wash off the sand that was stuck to her, but soon realised that Ianto was not there. Looking back, she saw him at the water's edge dipping a toe in and shivering. He was a baby, she thought, suddenly irritated. He was seven years' old and yet he was still frightened of anything new. Running back, she grabbed his arm and pulled him into the water, not letting go until he was up to his chest. He was all right then, once over his first fright he usually was, and the two children rushed in and out of the water, letting the waves take them off their feet. A piece of seaweed floated by and Ianto grabbed it and waved it at his sister who squealed and ran away, right into Mam who was standing nearby talking to the nice Mr Traynor. Mam laughed and snapped a picture of them both.

The time rushed past and soon the family was gathered on the blanket with a picnic spread out around them. They munched on ham sandwiches, hard boiled eggs and tomatoes and had an apple each for afters. The children drank orange squash while their parents had tea from a thermos. Mam made them be quiet for a while then, to let their dinners digest. Rhiannon thought this was quite unnecessary; at school she ran around immediately after eating her dinner and never felt ill. Fuming because she had nothing to do, she sat and watched the other children running about but, determined as she was, she couldn't stay cross for long on such a lovely day.

Ianto was sitting in the shade of Mam's deckchair with a book. He loved books and read all the time which puzzled Rhiannon who only ever picked one up when forced. She watched him now, his eyes moving back and forth across the page, and wondered, seriously considered, if he was really her brother. Perhaps the nurses had given them the wrong baby when Mam was in the hospital. It was quite possible, her friend Eleri said it happened all the time, and it would explain why Ianto was so different. But then she looked at Tad and Mam, who were both reading newspapers, and realised that Ianto looked like bits of them. He had the same eyes as Mam and the same nose at Tad, the one she had too. His hair was like Mam's as well. She sighed and flopped down to lie on her back. He was her brother after all, the hospital would never have been able to match up eyes and noses.

The chimes of an ice cream van coming up the promenade and stopping not far away drew all eyes and parents lined up to buy ices. Rhiannon saw Ianto look up and open his mouth to speak and knew what he was going to say. He never remembered, never realised how quickly Tad could change from being nice to being angry. She wasn't going to have this day spoiled.

"Can I go swimming again, Mam?" she asked loudly before Ianto could speak. Kneeling before her mother, she put her hands on the woman's bare knees. "My dinner's all gone."

Mam smiled. "I suppose so. Just don't overdo it."

"Hang on," interrupted Tad, folding the newspaper. "How about an ice cream first?"

Rhiannon stared at him. Had he really offered to buy them a treat? She couldn't believe it. "For all of us? One each?"

"Of course one each," he laughed. "Come on."

The children and their tad went to the van and after waiting in the queue he bought them all cornets with a large swirl of ice cream. Rhiannon looked longingly at the chocolate sticks and sauce and sprinkles but didn't ask for them, she didn't want to push her luck. Licking at the fast melting ice cream, she walked slowly back to where Mam was waiting for them and then stood savouring every last lick. Ice cream from a van tasted much better than a scoop in a dish at home.

The day continued to be miraculous in Rhiannon's eyes. The children swam then joined other kids in a football game and after a while Tad joined them, even making sure that the younger ones got their chance with the ball. Mam came and played for a while as well, along with Mr Traynor. He didn't have a wife and children and had come on the trip to make sure everything ran smoothly. Later, he took a picture of the family sitting together. And then it was time to get on the coach and head for home.

The travellers settled into their seats wearily, all tired from the fresh air and exercise. Once they'd set off and were out of sight of the sea, Ianto curled up with a smile on his face and started reading again leaving Rhiannon to her own thoughts. She looked round the coach and noticed Mam had her head on Tad's shoulder and he had his arm round her. They didn't do that very often, only sometimes when they were sitting on the settee in front of the television in the evening. On the whole, Rhiannon thought it was a good thing they were doing it now, it showed they had had a good day too.


	4. Kissing

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"It really was a perfect day out," said Rhiannon, "but we got back to normal the next day. Ianto had lost his coat. Tad was mad and smacked him really hard, made him cry and Ianto had learnt not to do that if he could help it. Crying always made Tad worse."

"But he was only, what, seven?" Gwen couldn't hide her disquiet.

"I know. Can't expect kids to keep track of their stuff. God, the school jumpers David's lost! Luckily it wasn't as bad as they thought. Ianto had left it on the coach and the driver brought it into the shop a couple of days later." She smiled wryly. "But it meant Ianto was kept in, not allowed out to play."

"He must have …" Gwen stopped. "I was going to say he'd have hated that but I'm guessing he wouldn't."

Rhiannon laughed, a cheery sound. "You knew him better than I thought! Tad never realised that Ianto preferred being inside with a book. Washing's done, I'll just get it out." She handed the album to Gwen and went to the washing machine.

Gwen looked back at the four photographs of the Jones' day at the seaside, pleased the children had had that one moment of unalloyed happiness. Gwen's own parents had been better off and the family had had annual package holidays to France and Spain or rented a cottage in the UK. They had been happy times overall, though she could remember angry words on most of them when things had gone wrong; putting three people together for a whole fortnight was asking too much of their patience. But her parents had never hit her and she had never had to think about the cost of anything. Meals out and visits to attractions were commonplace. Money had not been plentiful but the Coopers had ensured their daughter had all the treats that were good for her. Gwen had never thought of herself as privileged before but she was fast changing her mind.

She turned a page in the album and came across another of Ianto. He was in his school uniform standing in a garden with another couple of boys. He was taller than before but as there were no dates in the album Gwen couldn't judge how old he was. What caught her eye was the bandage askew on his right temple, standing out dirty white against his tanned skin. Was this more of his tad's handiwork?

"What've you got there? Oh than one!" Rhiannon was standing by the sofa looking down at the album while folding towels and laughing. "Looking at the bandage, right? All my fault."

Gwen was confused; had Rhiannon hit him? "I don't understand."

"It happened one night after school, a few days before that was taken. Mam was working all day by then, with both Ianto and me at school, and there were a couple of hours when we were on our own before she and Tad got in. We were supposed to go to a neighbour's house, Mrs Jenkins her name was, but she started on the sherry after lunch and never knew if were there or not so most of the time I came straight home." Rhiannon was still smiling at the memory. "I was twelve and quite tall and well developed for my age. People thought I was at least fifteen so I got away with being on my own. Ianto always went to Mrs Jenkins' and did his homework – he liked following rules – and came home when he'd finished. This night he came back earlier than usual and found me and my friends in the front room." She laughed again. "Poor lamb, didn't know what he'd walked into."

Her thoughts went back to that June evening …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: Kissing, 1992_

"You sure this is all right?" asked Megan for the umpteenth time. "Your mam isn't going to come in, is she?"

"'Cos not!" Rhiannon was getting cheesed off with Megan who was always whining about being caught. But they had been friends ever since their first day in the infants and Rhiannon didn't have enough friends to chuck them away, especially one that always followed her lead.

"Stop your whining," said Eleri, dumping her bag and jacket on the floor. She was far more confident and sometimes challenged Rhiannon's leadership of the little group. The two had managed to avoid a confrontation thus far, seeing advantages in keeping on friendly terms. "Where we going to do it?"

"In here."

Rhiannon looked round the front room, seeing the worn and stained three piece suite, the battered coffee table that had once been her nan's, the glass-fronted unit with a few bits of cheap china and fancy glassware, the large television that was several years out of date when it had been bought second-hand. The carpet beneath her feet was threadbare too. Seeing it like this, she imagined how it would look to her friends and a wave of shame washed over her; their homes were much more comfortable and modern. But Tad said there was no money for new stuff and at least the room – like the rest of the house - was spotlessly clean. Mam insisted on that and roped Rhiannon in to help every Saturday morning.

"Come on then, Megan." Eleri plonked down on a chair pulling the other girl to sit on her knee.

Rhiannon watched as her friends locked lips and made smooching noises. She'd brought them home to practice kissing, all the girls at school wanted to know how to do it, and now – because Susan had cried off at the last minute - she was the one without a partner. She slumped on the sofa and watched, deciding her friends were doing it all wrong. It was much different in the movies and on television and she was sure there shouldn't be that much dribble.

"It's not like that," she said, determined to take her leadership back. After all, she was the one who'd had the idea to practice somewhere private and brought them to her home. She kept a rein on her resentment at being left out. "Want me to show you?"

The other girls stopped what they were doing, both secretly quite happy to do so. "Go on then. Do it on her." Eleri pushed Megan in Rhiannon's direction and then followed her, sitting close beside them on the sofa.

For the next hour the three continued to practice but it wasn't satisfactory because one of them was always left out. This led to more resentment and things were about to come to a head when they heard the front door open. The three of them jumped apart and sat demurely on the sofa staring at the open door to see who would appear. Rhiannon was hoping it was her mam but knew this was too early. If it was Tad she would get a bollocking for bringing people home, he didn't like other people in the house. She was mightily relieved when Ianto appeared in the doorway and stood looking at them.

"What are you doing here!" she demanded. Attack had always been her first line of defence.

"Nothing." He was coming up to nine years' old and had found this one word the best way to answer questions until he knew what the questioner really wanted to hear.

A plan was forming in Rhiannon's mind and she stood up. "Come here then, you can help us." She grabbed his arm and pulled him into the room.

"I'm coming, don't pull my jumper!" He wrenched his arm away and straightened the material. His clothes were still important to him and he kept them clean and neat all day. He wanted to go to his room and read his history book, that way he'd be ahead for the coming week's lessons, but at this moment he felt powerless to resist Rhiannon. "Is this going to take long? I've got homework."

"Homework! Who cares about that?"

Rhiannon rarely completed assignments or, if she did, never handed them in on time. Lessons were still a mystery to her and she was barely scraping by in the bottom form of her year, not helped by the days she played truant. Her mam had done her best to make Rhiannon try harder and had recently talked to her again, explaining what kind of future she was likely to have without qualifications. It had gone in one ear and out the other. Rhiannon's ambitions were modest: finish school; get a job, probably in a shop; find a steady boyfriend; and, after a couple of years, get married.

"I do!" As Ianto had got older he had grown more stubborn and less easy to lead. He was doing well at school – near the top of his year in most subjects – and that had given him the confidence to stand up to his older sister sometimes. They would always support one another when their tad threatened them but otherwise Ianto was starting to realise that Rhiannon was not a good example to follow.

"It'll wait. This is educational too. Right girls?" She turned to her friends and they all giggled. "I know he's a baby but he'll do for practice."

"What?" Ianto took a step backwards but Rhiannon blocked his retreat. "What do you want?"

They showed him. Eleri took him in charge and sat him down before taking his head in both hands and locking lips. He fought at first but then relaxed. Rhiannon, who was in a chair with Megan trying a French kiss, watched out of the corner of her eye until she was sure he'd stay put. This was much better. They swapped partners a time or two, though Rhiannon refused to kiss Ianto.

Eleri was back with Ianto when she started French kissing in earnest and stuck her tongue down his throat. The boy didn't mind – it made him feel … good – but he didn't know how to react and so did nothing, including breathe, allowing her to continue the kiss for a very long time until she noticed him turning blue. With a shriek she released him, shooting backwards leaving him, in his faint, to fall forwards. With a sickening thud his head caught the corner of the coffee table and he continued to the floor completely unconscious.

"Shit!" exclaimed Rhiannon, dumping Megan off her knee and going to the boy. "What the hell did you do to him?" she demanded of Eleri.

"I think I've killed him." None of the girls had heard of people dying from kissing but their knowledge was patchy, maybe they could. Megan began to hyperventilate and suddenly sank to the floor, gasping for air.

While Rhiannon was not academic she had a lot of common sense and didn't panic easily. Seeing her brother collapse had been a shock but she got on with the practical necessities rather than indulging in melodrama or her own feelings.

"He's not dead." She could clearly hear him breathing. Her main concern was the blood coming from his head; if that stained the carpet Mam and Tad would never let her hear the end of it. Propping his head in her lap – better her skirt got bloody, that would wash - she glared at Eleri. "Get a towel from the kitchen, one of the green ones. Quick!" The girl shot to her feet and hared out of the room. Rhiannon turned her attention to Megan who was on the floor nearby and slapped her across the face, quite hard. "Stop being a drama queen!" she snapped.

Megan, shocked back to normal, held a hand to her stinging cheek. "What'd'you do that for, Rhi?" she demanded.

"'Cause I haven't time for your antics. If you can't help, go home."

Eleri reappeared and thrust the towel into her friend's hands. "Is he all right?" She looked paler than normal.

"He'll be fine." Rhiannon held the bunched up towel to Ianto's head and pressed hard. His eyelids were already fluttering and very shortly his eyes opened.

"What … what happened?" he asked, looking at the three faces looking down at him.

His sister thought quickly. If he'd lost his memory, she'd be able to steer him in the direction she wanted. She did not want him telling their mam and tad what had really happened. Most importantly, she didn't want them to know she was coming home instead of going to stay at Mrs Jenkins' house, that would spoil everything. There had to be a way of making this come out the way she wanted.

"You tripped on the carpet." All the family had done this at least once, catching a toe or heel in the worn patch by the door. "Then you fell into the coffee table, you idiot," she told him, throwing warning glances at Eleri and Megan. "We just got here."

"But -" began Megan, always slow to catch on. Eleri dug her fingers in Megan's arm to stop her saying any more. "Ow!"

"We'd better get on home," said Eleri. "You be all right with him, Rhi?" She was dragging Megan out of the room, picking up their school bags on the way.

"I'll manage. Meet on the bus tomorrow, yeah?"

"Yeah." The two girls left and Rhiannon heard Megan querying what was going on just before the front door slammed behind them.

"I don't remember tripping, Rhi," said Ianto in a quavery voice. He was still pale and content to lie on the floor a bit longer.

"Well you did, understand?" Rhiannon said this with some force. She checked the wound and saw the blood was, at last, starting to clot. "Can you get up?"

"I think so."

She helped him stand up and made him hold the towel to his head. Keeping an arm round him, she helped him into the kitchen and onto a chair while she rummaged in the cupboard for the first aid kit finally discovering it behind a packet of cornflakes. Back at the kitchen table, she checked the wound and washed around it with a clean piece of towel before bandaging it as best she could.

"That'll do," she announced when she was done. "You feeling all right?" Ianto had been very quiet throughout her ministrations and she was starting to be concerned.

"Bit of a headache."

Rhiannon went back to the cupboard and got the bottle of aspirin. With a glass of water, she returned to the table and doled out two tablets. "Take these, they'll help." She watched as he swallowed them. "Maybe you should go and lie down."

"Yeah." He stood up and walked shakily to the door where he turned round. "I won't tell Mam," he said his gaze steady, "about you and the others."

"Tell her what? There's nothing to tell!" she blustered.

Ianto's gaze never faltered, he just stood in the doorway looking at her. Rhiannon was the first to look away. How did he do that? Why did she always feel guilty when he looked at her like that, his bright blue eyes so accusing? He'd done it ever since he was small and she hated it. It was as if he could see right into her soul.

But he never did tell anyone what had gone on that evening.


	5. The Bully

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"He never did tell. In fact," Rhiannon went on thoughtfully, looking down at the photograph and remembering her teenage years, "I can't remember him ever letting on about anything I did. He could keep his mouth shut."

"He certainly knew how to keep secrets," said Gwen with feeling remembering once again the Cyberwoman in the basement.

"Must have, to keep that job quiet all these years. Mind you, if he'd said anything I'd never have believed him. And that explosion in the Bay, that was you lot?"

"Yeah, that was our base."

It was still hard for Gwen to appreciate that the Hub was gone. She, Jack and Rhys had stood on the side of the crater and seen the tangled metal, wood and concrete and yet she still couldn't quite believe she'd never walk through the cog door, see the Pteranodon flying above or sit on the couch drinking Ianto's coffee. Four years of her life had been spent in that place and it was now totally destroyed. Jack had gone back in there, climbing down to check that none of the many dangerous alien pathogens or captives were an immediate threat before giving her the responsibility for salvaging what she could. It had been very little so far but the workers were moving cautiously. The only part of the Hub to survive had been the Tourist Office but neither Gwen nor Jack had wanted to linger there. It was secured and would remain closed forever.

Rhiannon shook her head. "Not a word to me. He never told me anything," she said in bemusement. She idly flicked through the album.

"So," said Gwen with false brightness, "you taught Ianto how to kiss."

"Not personally, didn't want to kiss my little brother!" laughed Rhiannon. "But my friends did. And there were other times, over the next few months when he was roped in for practice. He enjoyed it - once he learned to breathe at the same time!"

"From what I've seen, Ianto was very good. Wouldn't have minded finding out myself!" said Gwen grinning.

"He was good looking. Never went through that spotty, gangly stage much either." Rhiannon had the album opened at a page which showed an older Ianto. "This is after he started secondary school, he'd have been … eleven, I guess, just before he had a growth spurt. Must have grown twelve inches in the year after this was taken."

The photograph was of a whole class, thirty or so boys and girls in a uniform of grey trousers or skirts with white shirts and green sweaters arranged in three tiered rows, one behind the other. Gwen immediately spotted Ianto. He was in the second row and stood out for the neatness of his clothes and his air of detachment. The other kids displayed either eager pleasure, feigned indifference or devilment. Only Ianto appeared to be mentally somewhere else entirely.

"Looks like he … well, like he doesn't want to be there," remarked Gwen.

"He probably didn't. Was never one for these sorts of things. Me, I loved 'em! Anything that got me out of the classroom was fine by me." Rhiannon grinned. "Ianto just wanted to learn, learn, learn."

"He never stuck me that way. Never showed off although …" Gwen grinned. "He had this saying, when he came up with some obscure fact or pointed out the obvious. We'd look at him, astonished, and he'd say 'I know everything'. I shall miss that." She wiped a tear from her eye.

Rhiannon smiled and gave her visitor a moment to compose herself, pleased that Ianto had friends to miss him. She looked again at the photograph reminded of an incident towards the end of Ianto's first year at secondary school …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: The Bully, 1995_

The school day was coming towards its end. Rhiannon Jones was vaguely listening as Mrs Blackstock scribbled obscure equations on the whiteboard but she only heard enough to know if the teacher might start wandering around the classroom. Rhiannon could make no sense of the subject and didn't even try. Why did they have double maths at the end of the day? It was torture. And why did it involve funny little symbols? It was all a complete waste of time. The only maths lessons she'd ever listened to were those about drawing up a budget and the importance of paying bills; that was useful for when she had a job and got married.

Glancing to her left, Rhiannon watched her friend Susan who was drawing one of her caricatures. She was good at that and Rhiannon smiled as, with a few strokes of the pen, a recognisable portrait of Blackie Blackstock emerged. With a sigh, Rhiannon turned her attention back to the lesson and waited for the bell to ring that would release her from this misery. It finally sounded fifteen minutes later and she shoved her books into her bag – the few books she had got out in the first place – and was moving almost before the echo of the bell had died away.

"Want to go into town?" asked Megan, joining her friend at the lockers.

"Maybe."

At fourteen Rhiannon had got bored of going home after school and tended to hang out elsewhere. If it was fine, they'd go to the park but if it was raining or cold, like it was today, the only dry and warm place was the shops in town. Leaning against the wall, she watched her classmates leave books in their lockers and head off for home. One of the boys, Lloyd, smiled at her and she scowled back. He may be fourteen but he was three inches shorter than her and weedy. Deciding it was time to move, she drifted down the corridor with Megan and Susan beside her. Eleri ran up to join them before they reached the stairs and the four girls were giggling as they went down one level and stopped near the sixth-form lockers, trying to look like they had a right to be there.

The seventeen and eighteen year old boys were much more to Rhiannon's taste and she had her eye on one in particular – Patrick. He was almost six foot, had a deep voice and manly stubble, and played for the school tennis and rugby teams as well as being a prefect. He'd smiled at her once or twice but they hadn't spoken yet. She scanned the boys by the lockers but there was no sign of him.

"Let's go," she announced, heading down the remaining flight of stairs and out by the nearest door. "This way." She led her friends along the back of the building towards the gym where she thought Patrick might be training.

"Do we have to?" complained Megan. She was the smallest and least mature of the four girls and not as interested in boys. "Let's go shopping. I've got some money; I'll buy us all a coffee."

"Sounds better that mooning over Patrick," agreed Eleri. "We're going to the shops," she announced, still the only one of Rhiannon's gang who regularly stood up to her. "Susan?"

"I'll go with Rhi." Susan smiled and the girls split into pairs and went their separate ways.

Rhiannon didn't mind missing out on the coffee. Megan had more money than the rest of them – her parents were divorced and made up for it with presents and cash – and Rhiannon didn't like being treated by her when she couldn't reciprocate. Her tad gave her three quid a week, had been shamed into it by their mam, but that didn't go far and certainly didn't leave any over for cups of coffee. Seeing Megan with cash to spare just rubbed in how much worse off Rhiannon was. She wished her own parents would divorce. In a lesson about relationships given by the school counsellor he had talked about the causes of divorce and wanted everyone to think about how they'd feel if it happened to their parents. He'd been really shocked when Rhiannon had told him she'd be happy and had wanted to 'discuss' it with her afterwards. It had taken weeks to get him off her case.

"What's going on there?" asked Susan, looking over to the fence where half a dozen of the younger boys were gathered in a semi-circle.

"Don't care." Rhiannon barely glanced in that direction. They were almost at the gym and she stopped, part hidden behind a large shrub to look in the large glass windows at the training session going on inside. She had just spotted Patrick and was admiring the play of muscles under his T-shirt as he used the dumb bells when Susan nudged her. "What!"

"Isn't that your brother?"

Rhiannon followed her gaze and saw the lads who had been gathered round were now chasing after another one that had previously been hidden. And that that one was … Ianto. As she watched, one of the chasing lads grabbed Ianto's bag and chucked it to one of his mates. Ianto tried to get it back but he was held back by two of the others and the rest opened the bag and dumped the contents on the ground.

"Oy, you lot!" she yelled, running over the grass towards the boys. "Put that down and leave him alone!"

Two of the lads saw her coming and backed off a bit but the rest stood their ground. They were in the year between Rhiannon and Ianto, twelve and thirteen year olds, and quite big, easily as tall as her. "You going to make us, darling?" one of them sneered.

"Bloody right I am!" she retorted not slowing her place and bringing her bag round and thumping him in the midriff. He let out a 'oof' as he bent forward. "Rest of you, back off!" She stood facing them breathing hard but keeping her eyes on them. Having grown up in the streets she knew what to expect and could handle herself. "Ianto, get over here."

"Get her!" shouted one of the boys.

The four bravest stepped forward, grinning. The one in the lead made a grab for her. Taking the initiative, she grabbed his shoulders and brought up her knee. He went down with a groan, clutching at his privates. The other three hesitated for only a second and then were on her. She battled them hard but three to one was too many. Then one of them dropped away, having to deal with Ianto who had jumped onto his back and was clawing at his eyes. Rhiannon was still losing, her hair was pulled and she'd taken a fist to the chin, when a flash of light on a knife blade made her realise the seriousness of her situation.

"Leave her alone!" thundered out and suddenly four large newcomers were separating the fighters. "Drop it!" The younger boys were quickly overwhelmed and the flick knife fell harmlessly to the ground.

"Rhi, Rhi, are you okay?" asked Susan, putting an arm round her friend.

"I'm all right." Rhiannon pushed her hair back and looked round. Her rescuers were Patrick and three others who played on the rugby team. They had rounded up the three boys who had been attacking her and the other two who had been pummelling Ianto. The one Rhiannon had disabled early on was still on the ground. She spotted Ianto bending to retrieve his books and stuffing them in his bag – the cause of the melee - and went to him, a little shaky on her feet but not showing it. "You all right, Ianto?" she asked.

"Yeah." He replied as he stood up. "You?"

"Yeah." Both were battered and bruised but not otherwise hurt. She hugged him, just for a moment, then released him.

"Headmaster's office for these," said Patrick to his friends.

"No, please," pleaded Ianto, "do we have to?"

"They attacked you and your sister." Patrick had been told this much by Susan who had rushed into the gym to get help when the fight had started. "No one likes bullies."

"I know but …" Ianto couldn't complete what he wanted to say and hung his head.

Patrick took him to one side, out of earshot of the rest, and Rhiannon went with them. "Look, what is it?" he asked kindly, an arm round Ianto's shoulders.

"They'll be worse, if I get them punished."

"He's right," put in Rhiannon, screwing back her hair which had come loose again. "They're bad enough now, the little sods."

"One of them drew a knife on you."

"Yeah, but he didn't use it did he? You stopped him." Feeling very daring, she placed a hand on his arm. "Can't you just tell 'em off. You're a prefect and all."

Patrick took a moment to consider the request, looking from her to Ianto. "I don't like it but … it is almost end of term. Maybe it'll blow over during the holidays. And if it's what you want - "

"It'd be best all round," she assured him with a smile. "Honest."

"Please?" added Ianto.

"All right." Patrick smiled at the two of them. "You two get off home while I give this lot a talking to."

"Thanks," said Rhiannon with relief. The headmaster would have made a huge deal out of the incident and the bullies would have plagued them even more. This way there was a chance it would be forgotten quicker. "Come on, Ianto. Got everything?"

The two of them walked home slowly, feeling their aches and pains and not saying much. Rhiannon did manage to get out of Ianto that the bullies had picked on him a number of times before, seemingly because he was interested in his studies. He was stoical about it, accepting it as part and parcel of life, as it was for him at this new school. Later, after they'd changed out of their uniforms, they sat in the kitchen drinking tea.

"You've gotta fight back, Ianto," she told him. "You can't just take it from them. They'll keep coming back if you do that." Sometimes she despaired of her brother who was so vulnerable.

"I don't see why they can't just leave me alone."

"They should, sweetheart, of course they should, but they like picking on people who are different."

He raised his head and stared at her. "I'm not different!"

"Yes, you are! You're always studying. I bet no one else does as much as you."

"I have to. That's the only way I'll get out of here." His expression became bleak and determined.

Rhiannon had no answer to this and sipped her tea. She felt they were drifting apart, each set on course for the rest of their lives that would separate them forever. While she wanted an undemanding job and marriage - not so very different from her parents' lives - Ianto was set on getting away from them entirely, to forge a career and a new life as far away from his roots as it was possible to get. She envied him his drive and determination and, in rare moments, queried her own choices, but at least her way didn't make her the target for bullies. She fitted in, he didn't.

"Do you understand, Rhi?"

"'Cos I do. But it makes you different from most of the rest round here."

"I know." The boy was silent, biting his lip, for a moment or two. "I don't want to end up like Tad," he said eventually.

"You could never be like him!"

"I think I hate him, Rhi," he added in a quiet voice.

Rhiannon was taken aback. She didn't like their tad, was scared of him, but hate? That was a very strong word. "He's our tad," she began cautiously, not sure what she was going to say.

"And he's as much a bully as those boys!"

"Yeah. I suppose he is." She'd not thought of it in quite that way but realised Ianto was right. Huw Jones enjoyed getting his own way and making his family conform to his wishes, never taking an interest in his wife and children or what they wanted or needed. He was willing to use violence on them too if they stretched his patience too far. "But there's nothing we can do about it. We're kids."

"It's still not right."

"No, it's not. Just … don't make him mad. Do what he wants and keep studying then you can get away."

Ianto raised his head and looked at her, blue eyes gazing into brown. "I don't want to leave you, Rhi. I love you."

"Come here, you daft sod." She enveloped him in a hug and they clung together for several minutes.


	6. The Show Must Go On

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"Did the school bullies stay away?" asked Gwen, thinking it better to say nothing about her bullying father.

"Mostly. Patrick warned them off and he was the school hero, the one all the younger boys wanted to be and who all the girls wanted to date. Expect you had one at your school."

"Oh yeah."

"Meant they gave Ianto a wide berth for the rest of that term and the next year he grew so much he wasn't such an easy target. Plus he'd made more friends by then so could hang out with them."

"And what about you? Did you get together with Patrick?" Gwen grinned at her. "Must have given you a reason to talk to him again."

Rhiannon grinned back. "Well … yeah, I did follow up, 'cos I did. We hung out for a bit but he was never interested in me, not really. Just liked having girls running after him." She looked back at the album and turned a couple of pages. "I thought I was pretty at the time but just look at that. What a sight!"

Gwen looked at the photograph and smiled. The girl was obviously Rhiannon – she hadn't changed that much in ten years – but she was trying so hard to look older and sexy that she'd lost whatever appeal she might have had. Her hair was scrunched up to the side and she was wearing too much, badly applied, makeup. Her clothes were unsuitable for her and revealed too much flesh. She looked more like a tart than the attractive young woman she could have been.

"I've got some photographs of me looking much the same," sympathised Gwen, feeling a small fib was acceptable.

"I got a bit better over the years," said Rhiannon, turning the pages to reveal more snaps of her – some with Ianto and her parents, others with a gang of friends. "Just took me a while."

"What's this?" Gwen stopped the page and pointed to one of Rhiannon in a nun's habit. "Career change?" she joked.

"Hardly! That was my one and only brush with the stage." She paused. "Actually, it was because of that Ianto stood up to Tad. He refused to let himself be bullied any more."

Her thoughts went back to the school auditorium in her last year at school …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: The Show Must Go On, 1996_

"… Jane, you need to control your arms more. Looked like you were using semaphore in that scene. Ryan, don't fiddle with your moustache. I know it tickles but you've got to leave it alone. Rhiannon, don't swing your hips so much. You may be the sexiest nun in the convent but it detracts from the action."

The assembled cast giggled and Ryan laid a comradely hand on Rhiannon's shoulder. She looked round at him gratefully, not abashed at being singled out but loving his touch anyway. He was a handsome guy and really good as Captain Von Trapp in the school's production of _The Sound of Music_. Ryan was also the reason she was here. She had mooned over him ever since he'd transferred in six months before and when he auditioned for the show Eleri, who was sick of her lovelorn friend, had dared her to do the same. Rhiannon was pleased she'd taken the dare as – to her surprise - she'd got a role as a background nun and been able to spend lots of time hanging round with Ryan.

"All right, that's the lot for now. Remember, dress rehearsal tomorrow at seven and we open on Friday," finished Mr Freeman, English teacher and director of the show.

A cheer went up from the thirty-strong cast, aged between eleven and sixteen, and they started to break into smaller groups all talking loudly. The younger ones who played the Von Trapp children went off with Mr Freeman to find their parents while the older ones made their own way home. Rhiannon stuck close to Ryan and was still with him when they emerged into the night with Tony, Mike and Nessa. All five lived in the same general direction and they walked along in a gang, talking about the show.

"Want to get some beers?" asked Rhiannon, not wanting the evening to end. "We can always get it from that shop on the corner. He'll sell to anyone."

Ryan looked across at Tony and then at her. "Not tonight, Rhi. Tony and I are going to do some French revision."

Mike spluttered with laughter and had to wipe the spittle from his chin. The others grinned broadly and Rhiannon joined in but she had no idea what was funny. With any other crowd she'd have demanded an explanation, forced one if necessary, but not with these. They were different, cleverer than her and made jokes she had no hope of understanding. The five of them walked on and Mike left them at his house. Rhiannon's house was next on the route and she paused at the gate.

"Good night," she said to them all but looking at Ryan.

"Good night, Rhi." He added, bending down to whisper in her ear, "Sexiest nun in the convent." With a laugh he straightened up and they all walked on.

Rhiannon watched them go, wishing she had some of their confidence and … sophistication. They came from better-off families than hers and had all the latest designer gear. Tony even had a mobile phone, one of only six in the entire school. It was mixing with them that made her realise how ordinary she was. She may be boss of her clique but she was common and ignorant compared to Ryan and his friends. The four of them were going into the sixth form when the term ended while she was looking round for a job. For the first time she wondered if she should have listened to her mam and made more of an effort with her own studies. She'd always managed to pooh-pooh the idea up to now, making fun of Ianto's success, but now she had the first stirrings of regret. Her chance of getting out of this place was gone, she'd be here for the rest of her life.

Squaring her shoulders she went up the path to the front door and let herself in. The house was quiet which meant Tad was in the front room. He liked to read his newspaper and have a nap in there so none of the rest of them could watch the television as it would disturb him. After hanging up her coat, Rhiannon went into the kitchen where she found her mam listening to the radio while she ironed.

"Hey, Mam."

"Rhi, didn't hear you come in." The woman looked up and smiled. "Your dinner's in the microwave."

"Okay."

"How was rehearsal?"

The two of them continued to talk as Rhiannon warmed up her meal and sat at the kitchen table to eat it and Nerys Jones worked through the basket of clothes. By the time Rhiannon was finished, the iron was put away and the two women sat at the table drinking a cup of tea.

"There's still tickets, Mam. For Friday or Saturday."

"I'd love to come, Rhi, 'cos I would but …"

"But Tad says no!" Rhiannon scowled. "It's the only play I'm ever going to be in, Mam! I leave school in a month, surely you could come even if he won't."

They had had this argument for the past three weeks ever since Rhiannon had got the part. She was unexpectedly excited at being in the play and had assumed her parents would want to come and see her. However, as soon as her tad had found out it would cost £10 each – to go towards a new lighting system in the school auditorium - he had refused. He said it was because he wasn't going to subsidise the school who already got enough from him through taxes but really he wouldn't give up an evening at the Debenhams' Social Club; he always went, on his own, on Friday and Saturday nights.

"I haven't got the money, love," admitted her mam. "I've had to get new shoes for Ianto, he's growing so fast, and that's left me short." Her wages were supposed to cover food and all her and the children's clothing and other needs while her husband paid the rent and utilities. In a good month she just made ends meet but when an unexpected expense came up, she was left struggling.

"Humph!" Her little brother was getting preference again, thought Rhiannon, annoyed that no one from her family was going to take the trouble to see her. Everyone else's parents would be there, only hers couldn't be bothered.

"I'm sorry, Rhi." Nerys reached a hand to her daughter but Rhiannon moved away. The sound of the television came through the wall; Huw Jones was awake now and had switched on ready to watch the news, his favourite programme. That meant he would want a cup of tea. "I'll make some fresh tea for your tad, want some?" Nerys pushed back her chair and stood up.

"No."

Rhiannon flounced out of the room, annoyed with herself for minding that she'd be the only person on stage with no family member in the audience. She went upstairs and changed into jeans and a top, let her hair out of its scrunchie and then headed back downstairs to watch television for a while; there was a decent programme on after the news. On the landing she stopped outside Ianto's room, looking in the part-open door. The room was very small with barely enough room for the single bed, wardrobe and chest of drawers as well as the almost thirteen year old boy. He was sitting on the bed with books and papers around him.

"What?" he asked, looking up at where she was just visible.

"Nothing." She made to go downstairs then changed her mind and pushed his door fully open and went inside. His room still held traces of his boyhood – toy soldiers and a couple of model planes on a shelf – but most of the space was taken up with books on a variety of subjects: some textbooks, some novels. "Mam won't come to the play," she said after a pause, standing with her hands in her jeans pockets.

He marked the page in his chemistry book and closed it. "She wants to, she told me."

"Yeah, but you needed shoes so she hasn't got the money!"

"I'm sorry. My others were falling to pieces as well as being too small." He waited, knowing it was best not to say too much when his sister was in this mood.

"They'd have lasted another month." She abruptly sat on the bed and he had to quickly reach across to stop his notes falling off.

"No, they wouldn't. They let in water." He could have added that he had had to wait for the shoes because Rhiannon had made a fuss about needing the jeans she was wearing but didn't, preferring to let her make the connection.

"It's not fair, Ianto. Why do we always have to go without? Other kids don't."

He shrugged. There was nothing to say, she knew as well as he did that Tad always had money to spend on himself – on clothes and socialising – but would never give any extra to his wife and children. He had decided long ago that paying the rent and utilities was his contribution. For the rest, the family had to rely on Mam who did her best to make ends meet.

They stayed chatting for a while longer and Ianto asked about the show. One of his classmates, Alun, was playing Kurt, the youngest Von Trapp son, and so he knew a fair bit about it. Her enthusiam surprised him. Eventually Rhiannon left and went downstairs, feeling better for having been able to vent her frustration.

The rest of the week flew by with school and the dress rehearsal filling her time. All too soon it was Friday night and Rhiannon was standing in the wings in her nun's habit, butterflies in her stomach. Most of the cast looked nervous, some peering into the auditorium which was filling up with parents and friends. She had seen Eleri and Megan out there, with Bryn and Dai their current boyfriends, and was relieved at least someone she knew would see her perform. For a brief moment she wished she hadn't broken up with Barry but she couldn't have kept him after seeing him snogging the class slut, Rowenna, the week before

"Ready for the fray?" asked Ryan, standing beside her. He appeared much older in his costume, makeup and moustache.

"I want to be sick."

He chuckled. "Me too. It'll go once you're out there. Break a leg." He gave her a brief kiss on the cheek and moved off to chat to Tony and Nessa.

Rhiannon looked after him, still tingling from the kiss. God, he was gorgeous! She didn't know why he was so nice to her but she wanted it to continue. All her efforts to get him alone, however, always failed. He was happy for her to be part of his group of friends but nothing more. She'd never been refused before and couldn't understand why he didn't respond to her advances. Boys liked her and she'd had a string of boyfriends in the past couple of years, allowing some heavy petting - but never going all the way like that slag Rowenna - so she was not inexperienced and yet Ryan still didn't make a move.

The school orchestra struck up the overture and the show began. Rhiannon got through her few scenes and watched the rest from the wings. At the end, there was appreciative applause and she was excited as they took their bows. Once out of her costume, she headed for the exit only to see Ryan leaving with his parents. Megan and Eleri came up to congratulate her and they left, with Bryn and Dai, for celebration chips eaten out of the paper in the park. Rhiannon appreciated the company but felt out of it without a boy of her own. She toyed with making a play for Dai, he had been her boyfriend before she'd passed him on to Megan, but decided against it. Instead she headed home, pleading tiredness.

Saturday was long and boring. She told Mam about the show as they did the housework in the morning and in the afternoon she went to the city and walked round the shops with Susan, looking in the windows and generally filling up time. At six she left for school, earlier than she needed but she thought Ryan might be there and be free for a chat. Backstage was quiet with just the props guys making sure everything was in the right place for the performance. Walking to the dressing rooms, she hesitated when she heard movement inside the one Ryan shared with the older boys. Was it Ryan in there? Would he want to see her? Deciding it was worth a chance, she gently pushed at the part-open door and looked through the crack.

She stepped back abruptly when she saw a shirtless Ryan locked in a passionate embrace with … Tony. Turning on her heel, she ran from the building not stopping until she reached the back of the gym. Crouching down, heedless of the dirt getting on her dress, she curled herself in a ball and cried. It wasn't fair! Why did he have to be gay! The comments and jokes of recent weeks came back to her and she cringed as she realised they had been laughing at her. They'd known she was mooning after Ryan and had made fun of her. They weren't her friends.

She allowed herself ten minutes to wallow in her misery then she wiped her eyes on a tissue and stood up. Managing to avoid seeing anyone, she slipped into the building and found a remote bathroom where she looked at herself in the mirror. Staring back at her was a twat, a stupid twat, who wanted to run away and never see Ryan and his stupid friends ever again. But that would let them win and she was not going to give them the satisfaction. With a splash of water she cleaned her face and then brushed off the dirt on her dress. When she was satisfied, and with only ten minutes to spare, she arrived in the nuns' dressing room where everyone else was already in costume. With no time to waste, she dressed and put on her makeup. Only when she was about to leave did she see the small bunch of freesias lying on the side with her name on the tag. They were her favourite flowers and she held them to her nose, drinking in their fragrance. With trepidation she turned over the tag, prepared to throw the flowers away if they were another of Ryan's tricks. Her mouth fell open when she read: _Good luck, Ianto_.

The performance that night went exceptionally well, everyone thrilled to be at the end of their two night run. It was only when she was taking her bow with the rest of the nuns that Rhiannon spotted her mam and Ianto in the sixth row of the audience, applauding like crazy. Avoiding Ryan and the others, she raced around backstage and was one of the first out of the exit. Going into the auditorium, freesias in her hand, she saw Mam and Ianto talking to Alun's parents.

Ianto, who looked taller than ever in trousers and shirt he had outgrown, spotted her and walked across, smiling broadly. She stared at him and especially at the cut above a black right eye; that hadn't been there when she'd seen him last. "You were great, Rhi, really good." He hugged her, awkward until she wrapped her arms round him and hugged him back.

"What happened to you?" she asked softly.

"Tell you later."

They were joined by Mam and the others and she was congratulated some more. It wasn't until they got away from the school and the three of were alone that she could ask again. "Ianto, what happened to your eye?"

"Tad did it."

"Why? What did you do?" She looked from him to her mam and back again.

"I took money from his wallet, for the tickets." Ianto's voice was unemotional, a mere statement of fact. "When he found out, he hit me."

She tried to get more details from him but he clammed up. Her mam wouldn't say either, deferring to Ianto, and eventually Rhiannon dropped it. She'd try again another time.


	7. Shoplifting

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"It was the first time Ianto stood up to Tad. Apparently he just faced him down and told him to do his worst. That he wasn't sorry he took the money and would do it again." Rhiannon sighed deeply. "I'd argued with Tad but nothing like that. From that point on Ianto refused to be cowed any more and Tad didn't know how to handle it so he lashed out with his fists. "

Gwen remembered Ianto standing up to Owen, using cool logic and a sardonically raised eyebrow to make his point when the doctor had been swearing and agitated. That contained manner had been highly effective on them all, even Jack, from time to time. And now she knew where it had come from, how he had developed it; standing up for what he believed to be right against his bullying tad.

"I've been on the receiving end of Ianto's stone face myself," admitted Gwen.

"Stone face? That's a good description."

"I'm surprised your mam went along with it. I mean, she came to the show even though she knew your tad was angry."

Rhiannon laughed. "Ianto made her come, she told me afterwards. You see, Tad found the money was missing just as they were leaving. He accused Mam first but she didn't know anything about it. After Tad's confrontation with Ianto she saw to his eye – it was a heck of a bruise – and made to stay home but Ianto told her to get her bag and then led her out of the house. She said she couldn't refuse him. He was only going on thirteen but he told her that she owed it to me to go to the show."

"Pretty gutsy of him."

"Yeah, it was."

The two women were silent. Rhiannon was proud of her brother but Gwen was sad; no child of thirteen should have been put in that position. She vowed that her child – boy or girl – would only ever know a loving home and absently rubbed at her abdomen.

Rhiannon caught the movement out of the corner of her eye and smiled. "That baby can't be moving yet," she said with a chuckle.

"No. I can't wait!"

"Believe me," said Rhiannon with feeling, "in a few months time all you'll want is to get rid of the thing! Swollen ankles, sickness, cravings, backache and constant running to the loo take their toll, take it from one who knows."

"Bring it on. I want it all!" exclaimed Gwen with a grin.

"You'll see. Mind you," Rhiannon admitted, "it is worth it. I wouldn't be without my two. Especially now I've been so close to losing them." She was staring at a photograph on the wall of David and Mica, taken a year or two earlier. "I still don't understand why that … thing went away. Why it left without our children."

Gwen was silent. The official explanation – hastily hammered out between Governments - did not mention the 456, putting the threat down to global terrorism by a previously unknown group. It wouldn't hold up to close scrutiny but all world leaders had been so shaken by the events that they were agreed on blocking calls for release of information to the press. Rhiannon knew a little more than most but even she had not been told of the means Jack had used, the sacrifice he had made for the sake of all Earth's children.

"Gwen?" prompted Rhiannon.

"I can't say any more, I'm sorry. Just know that Ianto was vital to overcoming the threat."

"But he was dead. I don't understand … No." Rhiannon sighed. "I can see I won't get any answers out of you."

"I'm sorry," repeated Gwen. She looked around for some other topic of conversation and her eye was drawn back to the photograph album. "I guess things were pretty difficult between Ianto and his father after that."

"There was a sort of truce between them most of the time and things went on as normal. Tad wanted Ianto to obey him and would test him, try to make him do as he was told, and Ianto would usually go along but not always. If he felt strongly about something he'd just look at Tad, eye to eye – he was as tall as Tad by then – and say 'no'. Nothing more, just 'no'."

"With his stone face."

"Yeah, with that face. Sometimes Tad would bluster for a bit and find a way to back down but other times he'd shout and use his fists. Ianto never backed down, no matter what Tad tried. Never retaliated either. I think that's what irritated Tad most, that Ianto never lost his temper." Rhiannon's face was bleak as she remembered those years. "It came to a head just before Christmas in '98."

She turned a couple of pages in the album and found the photographs she wanted. In the first, Nerys Jones was sitting hunched over in a chair beside a scraggly artificial tree decorated with a bit of thin tinsel and some mismatched ornaments. Rhiannon was standing on the other side of the tree smiling brightly but the expression was forced. In the second photograph, a self-satisfied Huw Jones sat on the arm of the chair by his wife.

"Christmas Day," said Rhiannon, showing the photograph to Gwen. "Tad took the first photo and I did the other one."

"Where was Ianto?"

"In the nick. Stupid bugger." She remembered the weeks leading up to that fateful Christmas …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: Shoplifting, 1998._

The Asda store was full of people getting ready for Christmas. They seemed to have an unlimited supply of money but Rhiannon Jones – sitting at the checkout and passing through all manner of goods - knew they didn't. Most of the people who shopped in her branch of the supermarket would be paying for their Christmas for months to come, barely paying off their credit cards before the next one. But at least they'd have an enjoyable time with plenty of booze, food and presents. Her own Christmas was looking like it might turn out okay too. Her new boyfriend, Johnny Davies, had asked her to a couple of parties and she was looking forward to them, anything to get away from home for a few hours.

Home was dismal. Tad was going round with his chest puffed out and an 'I told you so' look on his face. He never let up on Ianto who spent his time in his room except for meals or when he was working. Mam was trying to keep the peace, being especially subservient to Tad to keep him sweet. All in all, Rhiannon was glad to keep out of it and had worked extra shifts whenever she could. It meant extra money too which gave her a bit more to spend on clothes for the parties.

"Hey, Rhi, time for your tea-break." Maria Catellini looked bored and the red and white cap on her head – the store's concession to the season – looked out of place.

"I'll just sign off." Rhiannon scribbled her initials on the pad to show when she left the till and squeezed out. "Watch the belt, it's playing up."

"Right-oh."

Rhiannon walked through the throng of shoppers and the shelves of goods towards the back of the store. She had worked here ever since she'd left school, over two years now, and liked it pretty well. The work wasn't hard and it was varied, from re-stocking shelves to working the checkouts and manning the specialist outlets (electrical, DVDs etc). Rhiannon liked all of it and her easy going nature meant she got on well with her co-workers even though her mam was one of the shift supervisors. Pushing open the door, Rhiannon moved from the glitzy, well-lit store into the dimmer staff area and climbed the stairs to the canteen. Inside, she grabbed a tray and queued up behind the warehousemen for a cup of coffee and an iced bun. Looking round for somewhere to sit, she spotted a familiar figure at a corner table and headed in that direction.

"Don't you ever stop reading?" she asked, putting down the tray and slipping into the seat opposite Ianto. "Talk to me."

Ianto looked up and grunted before going back to his book. He read until the end of the paragraph, inserted the bookmark and put it down on the table. "What about?" he asked, taking a drink of his coffee.

"Oh, I don't know," she said ironically, elbows on the table and cup between both hands, "how about court on Monday?"

"Oh that."

"Yes, that! When you seeing the solicitor next?"

"Tomorrow."

She waited but he said nothing more. He was gazing out across the room, well away from her accusing gaze. "God, you were twat to get caught," she said eventually.

Ianto didn't need her to tell him that but, all in all, he wasn't sorry he'd done it. Plenty of others nicked stuff and it was just his bad luck he'd been caught. His only concern was that it would affect school. So much rested on him getting good grades in his GCSEs in June: he wanted to get his A levels and go to university if he could find a way to support himself. The recent interview with the headmaster had been … uncomfortable but luckily Mr Pugh had assumed the theft was an aberration on Ianto's part – privately the man thought Ianto had been led astray by other students – and he had been willing to let him continue his studies. There were too few good scholars at his comprehensive to let one slip through his fingers.

"You're going to plead guilty, right?" she demanded.

"That's what the solicitor said."

"Well, just be … sorry … and respectful. Then they'll let you off with a fine or community service. That's what Micky got."

She bit into her bun, wondering if Ianto was listening to her. He was so pig-headed sometimes, she wouldn't be at all surprised if he buggered up the whole thing and ended up in gaol. It had been five weeks ago that Mam and Tad had been summoned to the police station where Ianto was being held after being caught shoplifting. He'd taken a swanky pair of jeans from Top Man. Let out on police bail, he had been close-mouthed, refusing to get riled by Tad's constant harping on about the incident. Huw Jones had gone on and on about how he'd expected Ianto to 'go wrong' and was especially angry when there had been a report in the local rag, complaining that the whole neighbourhood now knew his son was a thief.

Rhiannon had laughed the first time her tad had mentioned this – every family on the estate had a kid who had had a brush with the law – and been told off in no uncertain terms. She hadn't cared much. Her tad's displeasure wasn't such a problem for her now she was earning and had a life outside the home. She had a wide circle of friends and spent most evenings out with them. Between her social life and work she rarely saw her tad and would have moved out altogether if she could have found somewhere. But she couldn't afford the rent private landlords demanded and the council only found homes for girls with kids or young married couples. Much as Rhiannon wanted to leave home, she wasn't prepared to be a single mother to achieve it. Marriage was her goal and she hoped to find someone to settle down with in the next couple of years. Until then she could cope with living at home.

"I know." Ianto scraped back his chair and stood up, stuffing his book into a pocket. "Gotta get back to work." He was chasing down trolleys in the car park and loathed it. However, the money came in handy and would be needed to pay the fine: his tad had made it clear he wouldn't be paying.

"Ianto, go careful." She was relieved when he smiled down at her.

"Yeah. You in tonight?"

"I'll be back after I finish here, about six. Probably go out later. Why?"

"Nothing. Just thought we could have a chat but it doesn't matter."

"I'll have time for a chat!" She hesitated then added before she lost her nerve. "Why don't you come out with us? It's only Megan and Eleri, maybe Susan. We're just having a drink."

"You won't want me hanging round. Anyway, I've got some geography revision I want to do. But … thanks. See you."

With that he was off, a tall, good-looking boy who turned heads as he wove through the tables. Watching, Rhiannon saw him stop and talk to their mam who was sitting with Roy Traynor, the store manager, the same man who had been with them on that day trip to the sea when they were kids. The man had bent the rules to let Ianto work here while the case was still hanging over him and Rhiannon was grateful; Ianto needed something to keep him occupied. Mam and Ianto didn't say much before he continued on his way.

The next few days passed quickly and it was Monday and Ianto's day in court. Tad had been persuaded by the solicitor to be there, with Mam, to show support for Ianto and the three of them got dressed in their Sunday best. Rhiannon couldn't get the time off but managed to get Ianto on his own in the kitchen while their parents were still upstairs.

"How you feeling?" she asked, brushing some fluff from the shoulder of his dark blue suit. He looked smart and very grown up.

"All right." He didn't meet her gaze and she waited, tapping her foot. "Okay, bit nervous." He smiled briefly.

"Remember what I said and don't be stupid. Just accept your punishment, right?"

"Right."

"If you need some help paying the fine, you only have to ask." Rhiannon was no fool with money – having worked hard to earn it she didn't waste it – and had a little nest egg in the bank. "It'll be a loan, mind."

"Thanks."

Footsteps on the stairs heralded the arrival of Mam and Tad and Rhiannon didn't have a chance to speak to Ianto again. She saw them into the taxi – a concession to the occasion – and then locked up and went to work.

It was a complete surprise to Rhiannon, when she got home that evening, to discover that Ianto had been lippy with the judge and been sent to Prescoed Young Offenders' Institution at Pontypool to serve a four week custodial sentence. He would be inside all over Christmas and New Year. Mam was tearful as Tad, sanctimonious as always, had forbidden her to visit Ianto. Rhiannon lost her temper with both of them. The Jones' Christmas was doomed from that moment; the tension in the house was thick enough to cut with a knife and remained so all over the holiday.

On the day after Boxing Day, Rhiannon made the trip to Pontypool - alone as her mam refused to disobey her husband. Prescoed was a modern building surrounded by fences and Rhiannon was daunted as she went through the many security measures before being allowed into the surprisingly light and airy visiting room which had been decorated for the season. There were a lot of other visitors – mostly women – which helped overcome the awkwardness when the prisoners were admitted. Rhiannon watched nervously and finally Ianto appeared, looking much the same as ever in shirt and trousers, and slid into the seat on the other side of the round table.

It was the first time Rhiannon had seen him since he went to court – they'd spoken briefly when he'd called on Christmas Day - and despite all her good intentions she said, "You stupid twat! What got into you? Why couldn't you keep your mouth shut!"

"Good to see you too."

She let out a heavy sigh. "All right, I suppose I shouldn't have said that, but honestly! You need your brains testing."

"I know."

"So why, Ianto? Why did you answer back?"

He was silent, looking at his hands which were clasped on the table in front of him. "I just … I'd had enough. Tad went on and on all the way there. About how I was a disappointment to him, how I was embarrassing him, how I'd never make anything of myself. When the judge started saying the same thing I just … lost it."

"You really choose your moments, Ianto Jones." She reached across and placed a hand on his. "How are you? They looking after you?"

"Yeah."

"Food all right?" she pressed when he didn't say more.

He nodded. "Better than at home. And they've got a great library. I've been on the computers." He spent all the time he could there when his other duties were done.

"Sounds like you like it in here." She was not surprised; Ianto would be happy anywhere he could be given unrestricted access to books. "What about the other boys?"

"They're all right. Leave me alone." He'd had one or two run-ins but as a minor offender had not been mixing with the real criminals.

They continued to chat, more at ease with one another now. Rhiannon listened to him carefully and was convinced he was telling the truth and would survive. Ianto was obviously disappointed no one else was going to visit but understood when she explained their tad's attitude. They compared notes on Christmas and – other than the parties she had attended – they weren't so very different.

Just before the hour ended, Ianto asked, "Rhi, will you do something for me? Will you go and see Mr Pugh, at the school, and get some books from him? They're for my GCSEs."

"Books?"

"I've talked to him. He said he won't expel me but there'll have to be a suspension, couple of weeks. He promised to let me have some books so I can keep up with the rest of the class. Will you get them for me?" His expression was more animated than she had seen it for a while.

"I suppose."

"He said they'll be ready on the first day of term. If you get them then, they'll be ready for when I get out."

"All right, if it means so much to you." She still found it hard to understand her brother's love of learning but it was the way he had chosen and she was happy to support him. "Another ten days and you'll be home."

"Might be sooner. They reckon I might get some time off for good behaviour."

"That's great." His expression was less than enthusiastic. "Don't you want to get out?" she demanded.

"'Cos I do. But you know what Tad'll be like. I don't know if I can get through another two years at home with him."

"He's not the only one at home, Ianto. There's Mam and me. We love you – even though you are the stupidest twat in Wales!"

Ianto met her accusing gaze and smiled wryly. "I know, Rhi, but Mam won't stand up for herself let alone for me or you. We've been through too much together and I don't want to lose you," he reached across and squeezed her hand, "but Tad and me'll end up killing one another."

"Now you're being stupid. All you've got to do is keep out of his way," she pressed. "You can stay late at school and go to the library in town. And I'll make sure I'm around in the evenings so you won't be alone with him. You've got to get your A levels and get that university place you've always wanted. One of us has to get away."

"But I know you want to leave too."

"I can wait another couple of years. I'm saving my money, should be able to afford somewhere by then or I may get married. Either way, there's no need to bother about me. You've got to get that university place, so no more shoplifting!"

"Thanks, Rhi."


	8. For Better or Worse

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"The next two years were awful," said Rhiannon with a roll of her eyes. "Ianto and I stuck together as much as we could and we managed to avoid too many rows with Tad."

"I suppose Ianto was studying hard."

"God, yeah. He went into school early and came home late. Even then he'd often go out again to the library. Never known anyone like him for studying. It was the devil's own job to get him out to a party or a pub."

Gwen sat back and rearranged the cushion behind her. "What about his friends? Did he have many?"

During the years they worked together, Gwen could not recall him mentioning any friends let alone meeting them. It had been two years before she knew he had a sister living locally. She'd assumed moving to London had cut his links to Cardiff and then the secrecy surrounding Torchwood and the trauma of Canary Wharf had made him retreat even more but now she thought it was rooted in his childhood.

"One or two. He'd go out for a drink with them occasionally, maybe once a week, but he was so determined to get away from us he didn't have time for anything else. Only had a couple of girlfriends and they had to do all the running. But the study paid off."

"He got his GCSEs and A levels."

"Of course he did." Rhiannon smiled proudly. "Eight GCSEs and four A levels, enough to get into University of Wales to do history. He chose Aberystwyth though he could have stayed in Cardiff."

"I was like that," admitted Gwen, "had to leave home in Swansea and come to Cardiff. Only just up the motorway but it makes a world of difference."

"Bet you went home more than Ianto." Rhiannon sighed. "He didn't come at all that first year though I shouldn't have been surprised he stayed away. You see it wasn't just Mam and Tad he wanted to leave behind, it was me too."

"I don't believe that. He loved you."

"And I let him down. Well, more disappointed him I suppose. I got married."

Rhiannon flicked through the pages of the album until she came to one of her and Johnny. She was in a traditional long, white dress with a short veil and bouquet of red roses with freesias while he was in a lounge suit sporting a buttonhole. Both were smiling and happy.

"That's a great dress. Really suits you."

"Thanks. It covers my bump reasonably well, that was why I chose it. I was four months gone by then."

"You really can't tell." Gwen thought back to her own wedding day – of which there were precious few photographs for obvious reasons – and going up the aisle nine months pregnant. The bump had gone by the time she and Rhys had taken their vows as had the Nostrovite mother. "You both look very happy."

"We were. Surprising really, I mean it wasn't planned. I was happy to have a reason to get away from home though it was another couple of months before we got a flat. Stayed with Johnny's mam until then. I would have been really happy but for Ianto."

"I would have thought he'd have been happy for you."

"Well, he wasn't! Reckoned I was going to turn out just like Mam because I'd got pregnant without a wedding ring on my finger. And he didn't like Johnny, thought I could have done a lot better for myself." Rhiannon shook her head and took a deep breath, angry even now at her brother's reaction. "He couldn't – or wouldn't – see past Johnny's outside. He's soft as butter inside and I knew he'd be a good husband and father. He never once tried to wriggle out of his responsibilities. I can remember it now, when I told him I was pregnant."

Her eyes stared into the photograph and a dreamy smile crept over her face …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: For Better or Worse, 2001_

It was an odd place to have an important conversation but on a wet Cardiff night in February there were few places where one could be alone. And so Rhiannon had dragged Johnny out of the pub and into the shopping precinct, deserted now the one mini-mart still operating had closed for the night. Bits of newspaper were blowing around and there were some unsavoury smells but she ignored these and pulled Johnny down on the bench beside her.

"What we doing here?" he asked, gesturing to the wasteland of vacant shops around them. "There's another half hour 'til closing."

"I told you, Johnny, I need to talk to you."

"You could have talked in the pub." He crossed his arms across his chest and hunched into his jacket. "We'll get our death out here."

"Will you just listen!" This was not how Rhiannon had planned this moment. From her earliest childhood she'd imagined finding a husband, getting married and then – after a suitable interval – telling him gently one evening, as they sat in their elegant house, that he was to be a father. Never in her wildest dreams had she imagined doing it in these sort of surroundings. "I'm pregnant."

Johnny was silent for several minutes looking at his feet then he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. "New Year?" he asked. The party had been pretty wild and they'd been too drunk to bother about condoms.

"No, Eleri's twenty first." That had been in the middle of January, seven weeks ago. "I should have got the morning after pill but I forgot." When she'd had problems with taking the pill regularly the doctor had told her about all the other forms of contraception and she and Johnny normally used condoms but on this occasion they'd not had any and had gone ahead anyway. "Sorry."

"Not your fault. I should have had some johnnies with me." He smiled, always amused that his name also meant condoms. "You want to keep it?"

"I think so."

"Best get married then, hadn't we?" He grinned at her and put an arm round her shoulders, pulling her towards him. "Was going to ask you sometime, may as well as be now."

The relief flooded over Rhiannon and she burst into tears. It had been an agonising couple of weeks since she had found out. She'd not told anyone as she tried to work out what she wanted. One day she'd think it would be better to have an abortion and the next she'd want to keep the baby no matter what. Gradually she'd realised that she wanted the baby but dreaded having to raise it alone or, worse still, having to raise it in her parents' house. Now Johnny had come through for her and her baby would have a father, a loving one at that.

"What you snivelling for? And you haven't said 'yes' yet." Johnny kissed the top of her head, her hair damp and starting to curl.

"Oh, Johnny." She reached up and kissed him soundly. "I love you. 'Cos I'll marry you."

"That's all right then. Who knows, about the baby?"

"Just you and me."

"What?" He was surprised and pleased that she had not told anyone else before him, she usually told her friends everything. "Not even your mam?"

"Specially not her." Rhiannon rested her head on his shoulder and pulled his arm around her. "I don't want to live with them, not any longer than I have to."

"There's room at mine and Mam won't mind." Johnny was the last of the Davies brood at home and he had a large room that would be big enough for the two of them. "Council should give us somewhere of our own. Have to see about that."

They stayed on the bench making plans until they were both too cold to sit there any longer. They agreed to tell Rhiannon's parents together the following evening, after tea when they'd both be at home, and then to go and tell his mam: his father had walked out on the family years before. Johnny drove Rhiannon home in his Mondeo, a rust bucket of a car but it got him about, and after a kiss and a cuddle she walked to the front door and let herself in. She was smiling as she walked quietly up the stairs and into her room. As she got ready for bed she looked round at the room that had been her own since she was a baby and couldn't wait to be gone. The tired furniture depressed her and the appalling flowery wallpaper – chosen without reference her – had not been changed for years and was marked and peeling in one corner. There and then she vowed that any house of hers would have plain, painted walls and light wood furniture. She was smiling as she drifted off to sleep, planning her perfect home and especially the nursery.

Johnny turned up at seven the next evening and Rhiannon led him into the front room. He had timed his arrival perfectly; tea was eaten and cleared up and the news was over. Tad was in his chair, the one no one else was allowed to sit in, and Mam was sitting across from him on the other side of the fireplace. Johnny sat on the sofa. Ianto was up in his room and Rhiannon was debating whether to call him or not when he appeared at the door, coat on and bag of books over his shoulder.

"I'm off to the library," he announced to no one in particular and made to leave.

"Don't go," said Rhiannon quickly, going to pull him into the room. "Please," she hissed with a meaningful look, "I want you to hear this too."

"What?" he stood awkwardly just inside the door looking round.

"Mam, Tad," began Rhiannon, perched on the arm of the sofa, "Johnny and me, we're …" she wasn't sure how to continue.

"We're going to get married," announced Johnny with a beaming smile, gently pulling Rhiannon down to sit beside him.

There were shocked reactions all round. Nerys Jones stared at her daughter then down at her abdomen before quirking one eyebrow. Rhiannon placed a protective hand on her stomach and looked away. From his chair, Huw Jones huffed once or twice but said nothing. Glancing up at Ianto, Rhiannon saw his look of horror and that affected her more than her parents' apparent indifference.

"Well say something, someone!" she demanded, clutching at Johnny's hand and grateful for his arm round her shoulders.

"Congratulations, love," said Mam with a smile. "Don't want to wait too long, I expect."

"What? What's the rush?" asked Tad, annoyed he'd missed some nuance his wife had picked up on. The obvious reason for haste occurred to him then and he looked sharply at Rhiannon and Johnny. "You up the duff?"

"Yeah, isn't it great?" beamed Johnny, either unaware of the atmosphere in the room or determined to ignore it. "I'm hoping it'll be a boy. Could do with a prop forward in the family."

"I'm off," said Ianto and was out of the room before anyone could stop him.

Rhiannon jumped up and ran after him catching him on the front doorstep before he could slam the front door behind him. "Ianto! Ianto, wait up!"

"Why? You've got what you want, Rhi. But why this way? And why him?" He gestured wildly towards the front room.

"I didn't plan this. Not … the baby. But I love Johnny and he'll -"

"He'll be just like Tad! He'll make your life hell and you'll have to take it because of the kid. You'll be just like Mam!" He turned and took a couple of paces down the front path.

She followed him, grabbing his bag and swinging Ianto round to face her before slapping his face. Hard. "Shut up! Just shut up! You don't understand and you don't know Johnny."

"I know enough." He wrenched himself free from her hold and stalked down the path without looking back.

Rhiannon could not believe that Ianto had reacted so badly to her news. They had talked about how they were going to get away, him through education and her through marriage, and had been allies. He was on his way and would be leaving in the summer if his exams went well - as she knew they would - and that was only possible because she had helped him, had kept Tad off his back. And now he was criticising her choices? Who the hell did he think he was! What other options did she have? Where was his support when she needed it?

"Come on in, Rhi," said her mam from the doorway. "He'll come round."

"Yeah." Rhiannon wiped her eyes and went back indoors.

The next hour was filled with stilted conversation about wedding arrangements and other practicalities; Rhiannon and Johnny were pleased to leave. They walked, hand in hand, to his home and were welcomed by Jean Davies who had been let in on the news earlier; Johnny was lousy at keeping secrets. Jean was like her son - large and boisterous – and she was what they both needed. Their chat covered the same issues but this time with enthusiasm and joy. Rhiannon was shown Johnny's room and she and Jean discussed how it could be made more appealing for when she came to share it. At that moment, Rhiannon wanted to stay more than anything – regardless of the dirty clothes on the floor and the musty smell – and it took a lot of resolve to accept that she had to return to her parents' home. Finally all three of them left the house and went to the local pub. Their news was soon circulating and they were congratulated by everyone with Johnny revelling in the attention and free pints. To Rhiannon, seated at the bar drinking orange juice, her friends round her, it seemed everyone was happy for her except her own family.

It was two days before Rhiannon got Ianto on his own. He had been even more elusive than normal and stayed out from early in the morning until late at night. She was lying in bed in the early hours of a Thursday morning feeling a little sick when she heard him go downstairs and followed. He was in the kitchen standing in his boxers and old T-shirt getting a drink of water when she came across him.

"Ianto."

He turned round quickly, not having heard her, and looked like a startled rabbit, an image enhanced by the hair standing up at the back of his head. "Rhiannon."

"I want to talk." She took a couple of plain biscuits to settle her stomach and sat at the table, drawing her dressing gown round her. "We need to talk."

"Now? It's the middle of the night and I'm cold." He put the glass on the drainer and made to leave.

"Too bad. Sit down, Ianto. This needn't take long." She met his gaze and it was him who looked away first.

With a sigh, he pulled out a chair and sat down, crossing his legs. "Go on then."

"I love Johnny. And don't pull faces! I do and he loves me and we're getting married on the sixth of May whether you like it or not. It's not just because I'm expecting, we'd have got married anyway, it's just brought it forward." She kept her gaze on him. "Why can't you be happy for me?"

"Johnny Davies is a waster! He's a bin man now and that's what he'll be for the rest of his life - unless he gets the push. You can do better for yourself." He had turned and was facing her now, trying to get her to understand. "It's not too late, Rhi. You don't have to marry him, or have his baby. Don't get trapped!"

She bit back her immediate retort and made herself count to ten. "Didn't you hear me? I told you, we love each other. I want to marry him. And I want this baby."

"It's like Mam and Tad all over again," he said disgustedly.

"No, it's not!" she exclaimed, bringing the palm of her hand down on the table. Lowering her voice, she went on, "You think I'm like Mam? Don't you give me any credit? I'll not be the doormat she is, believe me."

"You may think that now, I expect Mam did too, but after another year or two when you're stuck in a dead end marriage with a kid, more than one probably, you'll be as downtrodden as she is."

"No." Rhiannon took another breath to calm herself. "What else is there for me, Ianto? Tell me that. There aren't that many blokes out there who'd look my way. And marriage IS the only way I have out of here. You know that, we've talked about it often enough."

"It's not too late, Rhi. Ditch Johnny and get rid of the baby. Soon as I'm finished with school we'll leave here, go to Aberystwyth. I'll go to university and you can get a job. We'll manage, together we'll manage."

"And then what? I slave away to provide a roof for us and when you're through with studying, what then? You'll want to make a life for yourself, you won't want your big, dumb sister hanging around."

"You are not dumb! I'll get a job, support you for a change, and then you can do what you want. You could get some qualifications too." He was leaning forward, his expression earnest and he tried to convince her it could work. "Get a decent job."

Rhiannon thought he had never looked younger. He was a naïve seventeen year old who knew little outside his books. He may have been raised in the same house as her but he had withdrawn into his own world early on and had little concept of real life. She didn't doubt his honesty and generosity - he was truly trying to help her - but he had not considered what she wanted and the options open to her. For the first time she wondered what awaited him at university and afterwards. What kind of job would he end up in? How would he manage when he had such a withdrawn, private way about him? It gave her the shivers to think about it but he was almost an adult, time to let him stand on his own feet.

"I'm twenty one, Ianto, and I'm never going to get any more qualifications than I have right now." The fact she had two GCSEs was a miracle. "I know what I want and I've told you what that is over and over these past years. I want marriage and children and a family."

"But not with that twat Johnny! You can do better than that!"

"It's not easy to find someone to love and I'm lucky, you hear me? Lucky that Johnny loves me. And he's a good man. He's generous and funny and he wants me and our baby. You're going to get what you want, don't begrudge me what I want."

"I don't believe this." He pushed his chair back. "If he's the best you can hope for then maybe you deserve one another. I'm going back to bed." He stood up and left the room.

Rhiannon sat for another ten minutes, weeping silently; she hoped she had not lost her brother forever. Then she squared her shoulders and followed him to bed.

The weeks flew by and Rhiannon was busy with preparations for the wedding and making Johnny's room ready. She packed up her things – so few boxes - and took them over to the Davies home which was so much more welcoming than her own; she found herself inventing reasons to stay. Then the day arrived and she stood in her denuded bedroom in the hired wedding dress looking at herself in the full length mirror. It hid her small bump and made the most of her breasts. Her hair and makeup had been done professionally – a present from the girls – and she felt like a million dollars.

"You look beautiful, Rhi." In the mirror she saw Ianto standing in the doorway, smart in a grey suit and white shirt with a red tie which matched the rose in his buttonhole.

"Thanks." Slowly she turned, keeping the dress away from the leg of the table where it might snag. "You look smart."

He shrugged. "Mam and Tad have gone. Car will be back soon." It was the one point she had insisted on, she wanted Ianto to be with her when she arrived at the registry office not her tad.

"Better get downstairs then." She checked herself one last time and then walked carefully down the stairs, not used to wearing a long dress. "Where's the bouquet?"

"I'll get it." Ianto went to the kitchen where the flowers had been kept cool. Back in the front room, he handed them to her. "I see you managed to get freesias in there."

"They're my favourite, had to have those." She brought the flowers to her nose and smelt the rich fragrance. "Remember those you gave me when I was in that daft show?" She grinned at him. They had made a kind of peace once she had been busy with wedding preparations and he with his exams. "I really needed those."

"I'm going to miss you, Rhi. So much." He blinked hard.

"Stop it! Don't make me cry, my mascara will run."

"Johnny'll think he's marrying a zebra," he joked. "Mind, he'll have to get used to it if he's going to see you first thing in the morning."

"Oy!" She thumped him lightly on the arm. "You're not too big for a clout round the ear."

They stood in silence, neither sure what to say next. After today, Rhiannon's home would be elsewhere and her life changed forever; in half an hour she'd have a husband and in months a baby. She would never again spend a night in this house, or have to visit, unless she wanted to; she was free to live her own life at last. Ianto would not be here long either. He had got a cheap room lined up in Aberystwyth for the middle of July where he was going to work in a coffee shop, getting some money together to augment his loans and grants. They were both getting out of the house that had seldom been a loving home - and had often been a hateful one - and neither had any regrets.

"Rhi ..." Ianto looked at his shoes then back at his sister. "I hope it works out, for you and Johnny."

"Thanks." She held him close but not so hard that it crushed her finery. "I'm going to make it work. And if you ever see me getting like Mam you have my permission to shake me. Okay?"

"You give me a kick up the backside if I ever slack off studying. You've got out and I'm not going to be far behind."

A blast on the horn from outside in the street told them the car had returned. It was time to leave. Rhiannon felt very proud as she walked out of the house on Ianto's arm to the scattered applause of the neighbours gathered to see her off. She felt only joy at leaving the only home she had known thus far. Today was the start of the rest of her life and she was going to make it a good one, for her, for Johnny and for her unborn child.


	9. Parting of the Ways

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"The rest of the day was perfect. A simple ceremony followed by a buffet at Debenhams' Social Club. Johnny and me would have liked a disco in the evening for our friends but Tad said no – it had been hard enough to get him to pay for the reception – and we couldn't afford it. Instead we had a party at Jean's house the following weekend. It was a blast."

"Did you manage a honeymoon?" asked Gwen. The album was open at photographs of the reception and she saw the usual mix of family and a few close friends. It was very homely and at least they all remembered it, unlike the guests at her own wedding.

"Not a proper one. Jean got us two nights at a B&B in Tenby. Right on the coast it was and the weather was great." Rhiannon smiled to herself. "Johnny liked it because it was a stone's throw from a decent pub!"

"Rhys is just the same. Take him anywhere and he's sussing out the pubs before he's looked at anything else. I swear his perfect holiday would be a week in a brewery!"

"Johnny too!" The two women laughed, resigned to the foibles of their menfolk. "He settled down though, after we were married. Got a bit too attentive as my pregnancy went on, had to kick him out of the house some evenings just to get a bit of peace."

"Was it an easy pregnancy?"

Since discovering her own state, Gwen hadn't had much time to think about the changes her body was going through and what it would be like. She was excited about it all and desperate to feel all the highs and lows her friends had told her about but at the same time just a little apprehensive. She wanted to do everything right.

"Uh-huh. Had all the usual things – my legs got really swollen – but otherwise it was plain sailing. David arrived on the fourteenth of September, right on schedule. Worked up to three weeks before and only had a six hour labour."

"That was lucky." Gwen's friend, Annie, had told every excruciating detail of her twenty hours in the delivery room. After hearing that, Gwen had silently vowed to have an epidural.

"It was twice as long with Mica," chuckled Rhiannon, pulling a face. "She didn't want to come out." She quickly turned some pages in the album. "Here. This is David at two days' old and this one's Mica, she's about a week old."

Gwen looked at the snaps and smiled. The babies were like most others at that age – large heads and small bodies and all sort of scrunched up – but they had the look of Rhiannon probably because they'd both inherited her colouring. They were dressed in Babygros (one blue, one pink), obviously well cared for and lying in Johnny's arms. He looked so proud of his children, looking down at them with the slightly stunned expression all fathers of newborns wear for the first few weeks.

"They're beautiful."

"I think so but then I would," agreed Rhiannon. "You'll think the same of yours no matter what it really looks like. God, you should have seen my friend Megan's first! A girl, huge she was, over ten pounds when she was born, looked like a boxer. And I'm talking about the dogs. Had to be really careful what I said."

"Had the same with my cousin. Her baby had this funny shaped head and the biggest ears you've ever seen."

They laughed together at the shared memories and Rhiannon showed Gwen a few more pictures of David as a baby and during his first year. He was a fine, sturdy child and by his first birthday was cheerfully walking round furniture and grinning at the camera showing two small front teeth. He was with other people in some photographs and Gwen recognised Rhiannon's mam in quite a few. There was only one where her tad was in shot and then he was merely in the background ignoring his grandson. There were two with Ianto: one of him holding a very small David and another, about a year later, where they were sitting on the floor playing with bricks.

"Ianto wasn't about that year," explained Rhiannon, her voice sad. "He went off to university and came back once, for the day, a couple of weeks after David was born and then not again until he was a year old. And that was only because Tad died."

Gwen waited, unable to think of anything to say that would not sound trite. Ianto had obviously cut himself off from his family as soon as he left for university, severing the ties with a family that had – in his opinion – held him back. She understood better now why he had said so little about his background, why he had invented, or rather embroidered, stories about his past. And the one person whom he had loved from that time, his sister Rhiannon, had been dropped along with the rest.

"Tad dying came out of the blue," went on Rhiannon, "and it led to a lot of changes." Her mind went back to the first indication of the changes to come …

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: Parting of the Ways, 2002_

Rhiannon waited in the ticket hall of the railway station, pacing up and down as various announcements were made over the tannoy, all except the one she wanted. The train from Aberystwyth had been delayed and Ianto had missed his connection at Shrewsbury, having to wait nearly an hour for the next one, and the one he'd caught was running late. She fingered the mobile in her coat pocket but decided against ringing him again; he'd get here when he got here.

"Hello, Rhi."

She whirled round to see Ianto standing behind her, taller than her now and filling out a bit at last. He was neatly dressed as always, his ironed jeans and university sweatshirt over a shirt showing beneath his open jacket. "Ianto! I didn't hear … Oh, it doesn't matter. It's good to see you." She hugged him briefly, neither comfortable with shows of affection.

"Couldn't really not come," he said as they began walking towards the exit. "Though I can't say I wanted to."

"I know."

Their tad had died the week before, collapsing with a massive heart attack while digging the vegetable patch one evening. Nerys Jones had returned three hours later - from a late shift at Asda - and found her husband dead and cold. He had been forty seven and his death was totally unexpected. The postmortem had found evidence of undiagnosed heart disease and released the body to the family. The funeral was the following day.

"Let's have a drink. You can tell me what's been going on," suggested Ianto, hefting his bag further onto his shoulder. He hadn't brought much with him, not intending to stay more than two nights.

They walked along familiar streets until they found a pub and went inside. It wasn't too busy and they got a table in a corner. Ianto left his bag and went to get the drinks. Rhiannon watched him go, taking a moment to observe him. He had left for University of Wales, Aberystwyth over a year ago and been home only once since, for less than a day, supporting himself by working in a coffee shop. The independence had made him withdraw into himself even more and she couldn't see anything of the little brother she remembered growing up. She had tried to keep in touch with him, phoning as often as she could, but she had a baby to care for and Johnny to look after as well as a job. Besides, she didn't see why it always had to be her who called him, he was nineteen after all.

Ianto returned with the drinks – beer for him and red wine for her – and sat down. "Cheers."

"Cheers. You're looking well." Inwardly she cringed. She sounded like her mother or, even worse, Auntie Muriel! Had they grown so far apart that they had lost the ability to speak freely? They used to confide in one another, now it was all clichés.

"You too." He paused before adding, "How's Mam?"

"All right. She's not particularly upset. I guess none of us are."

"If he'd wanted us to be he should have been a better husband and father!" Ianto put his glass down with a thump.

"You don't need to tell me!" she retorted, using a napkin to wipe up a spill of wine. "But he's gone now, no need to speak ill of the dead." She cringed again, more clichés. "Soon as the funeral's over, you can disappear back to your precious university and leave me and Mam to get on with our lives." There was a tense silence as they both studiously looked at anything but one another and sipped their drinks.

Ianto sighed. "Sorry."

"Me too." They managed weak smiles and the tension dissipated. Rhiannon sat back in her chair. "Mam's got your room ready for you. I thought it was best if I came to meet you so she's looking after David." It had not escaped Rhiannon's notice that Ianto had not asked after his nephew. He may not like Johnny but she had expected him to remember David who he had not seen since he was a few days' old; he was now starting to walk and make recognisable sounds.

He asked about her family then and they became more comfortable with one another as they finished the drinks. Ianto was on his second beer when the conversation returned to their parents.

"There's a bit of news," began Rhiannon cautiously. She didn't want to upset Ianto again but he had to know before he met Mam. "From the bank manager."

"Don't tell me, Tad had another family and they've got whatever he left." He grinned wryly, remembering how much Huw Jones had disliked family life and how that had blighted his childhood.

"No!"

"Left it all to a cats' home, has he? That would be like him. Spiteful to the last."

"He had a special kind of bank account, an extra one, put money in it every month which was converted into shares. Apparently it was so he could start up his own tailoring business." Rhiannon remembered sitting with her mam in the bank manager's cluttered office and learning this news. They'd stared at the man, totally unaware of this side of Huw Jones' life but in another way not at all surprised that he still hankered after the career that had been denied him, the one he had felt entitled to ever since he was a boy.

"The stupid bastard," was all Ianto said.

Rhiannon took a deep breath and continued. "There's £125,000 in the account, give or take."

Ianto stared at her, his mouth opening and closing before he could find the words he wanted. "You mean ... We were ... All the time we had make do with hand-me-downs from those snotty Morgan cousins he was putting that money away? Making us go short?"

"Yeah."

Rhiannon had had the same reaction. As children they had gone without so much when just a few extra pounds would have made all the difference. Later, when she and Johnny had got married, they'd been lucky to get a housing association flat, one with a small garden, just before David was born but they'd had nothing to put in it except furniture bought cheap from charity shops or donated by their families and friends. They could have done with a helping hand then too. Just a hundred pounds would have bought new stuff for the baby yet Tad had kept this money secret and let his grandson and his whole family go without, just to pursue a forlorn dream.

"What did Mam say?"

"Not a lot. Too surprised, I reckon. But she wants to talk to the two of us tonight."

"Suppose we'd better go then." He drained his glass and stood up, putting his jacket back on before picking up his bag.

As the two of them travelled across the city on the bus, Rhiannon kept up small talk about changes to the neighbourhood and news of old school friends. All the time she was aware of how contained Ianto had become, responding to her chatter in monosyllables and not giving any clue about what he was thinking. He was no better when they reached the family home – three streets from Rhiannon and Johnny's – hugging Mam, playing briefly with David and then disappearing to his room to unpack and have a bath. Rhiannon packed up the baby's things and left for home, still wondering about her brother's reaction.

She returned at seven thirty, with David, after eating with Johnny and sending him off to the pub. Letting herself in, she manoeuvred the buggy though the narrow passage to the kitchen where she could hear voices. "Hiya, sorry I'm late. This one took ages to have his bath." She smiled down at her slumbering son.

"We've only just finished our meal," said Mam, with a smile. "I've been hearing all about Ianto's life at university."

"More than I have," she commented, tucking in David's covers and hoping he'd stay asleep. "Could hardly get a word out of him earlier."

"There's not much to tell. I study all day and work in the coffee shop all night and at weekends. The sum total of my life." He scraped his chair back and took the dirty dishes to the sink.

"He did well in his exams," said Mam with false jollity. "He got all the brains in the family."

"Thanks, Mam!" Rhiannon's exasperated tone reflected her sudden irritation. She knew Ianto was brighter than she was but she didn't need her mam to rub it in.

"I didn't mean anything, Rhi. Leave that for now, Ianto," she continued when she saw him about to start on the washing up. "I want to talk to you both."

"It'll take five minutes," replied Ianto squeezing washing up liquid into the bowl, "then I'll make you a coffee." He had sent his mam a cafetiére for Christmas and had seen it, still in the box, on the shelf with the pack of expensive coffee. "You two go in the other room, I'll join you shortly."

Like docile lambs, the two women took David and went into the front room. Settled on the sofa, the buggy beside her, Rhiannon looked round at the tatty room unchanged since her teenage years. She wondered if her mam would use some of the money on decorating; the whole house needed it. They fussed over the still sleeping David and ten minutes later Ianto came in with a tray containing the cafetiére of coffee and three mugs. He poured for them and then settled in the chair that had always been their tad's, not to be used by anyone else if he was in the house.

"I've been telling Ianto about tomorrow," Nerys Jones began. "We leave from here at ten and go straight to the crematorium. Afterwards, there's tea and sandwiches laid on at Debenhams' Social Club."

"Any more idea how many will be coming?" asked Rhiannon.

"I know of thirty or so, but there could be more. However many it is, I want you two to behave yourselves. I know your tad was a poor father to you both – he wasn't much better as a husband – but we'll show a decent respect for him now he's dead."

Rhiannon almost dropped her coffee mug and stared at her mam, aware Ianto was doing the same. In all their years, Nerys Jones had never criticised her husband in front of them.

"You don't need to look at me like that," said Mam with a bleak smile. "None of us is sorry he's dead so there's no need to pretend to ourselves but I will not have my neighbours or family knowing how we feel. Understand?"

This was a new woman, one that Rhiannon didn't know at all. All her life it had been Tad dominating the family and Mam somewhere in the background keeping things ticking over, the peacemaker whenever possible. She had never stood up for the children, supporting her husband in whatever he did even when he'd punished them for no reason. Rhiannon had lost respect for her mam years before but had become a bit closer after marrying and moving out, knowing that the few hours the older woman spent babysitting twice a week were the only time she got away from Tad except when they were at work.

"If that's the way you want it," agreed Rhiannon. Ianto nodded his agreement.

"Good. I've made some decisions, about the future. I'm giving up this place soon I can and buying a flat in the city centre. With the money Tad left and what I earn at the supermarket I can get a mortgage on a one bedroom close to the shops. Means you won't have a room any more, Ianto, but as you come home so rarely I can't see that'll be a problem."

"I don't intend to come back here after university," his voice unemotional. "I'll be going to London."

This was news to both women. Rhiannon felt a wave of pity for him, for herself and for their mam. There were only the three of them and they were being pulled even further apart; Huw Jones had a lot to answer for. She hoped St Peter was giving him a grilling or, even better, that he was feeling the fires of hell.

"Fine. I've decided to give you both £25,000 of this money. Rhiannon, I want you to keep control of yours – don't let Johnny get his hands on it – I want you and David to have something to fall back on. Ianto, you can use yours -"

"I don't want it. I want nothing of his." He leaned forward and put his mug on the tray, his voice calm. "Keep it or give it to Rhi, I don't mind, but I don't want it."

Rhiannon couldn't quite believe what her mam was saying. The most she had ever had in the bank was a few hundred pounds saved from when she was working at Asda but that had been depleted in the past year. Johnny's and her combined wages and the child benefit paid for rent, utilities and food but there wasn't much left over. As she was determined that her child would not miss out as she had she'd dipped into her savings to ensure David had the extras he deserved. This money from her mam meant she'd have a nest egg for her family's future. She'd understood what her mam had meant, that with the money she'd be able to set up on her own if the marriage turned sour, but that wasn't likely. Johnny may be a bit of a lad but he was a good husband and they had a solid marriage, one that was more equal than her parents' had ever been.

She looked at Ianto's closed and set features and wondered how he could turn down the money. But she didn't say anything. Whereas in the past she'd have challenged him, had demanded he take it, there was something about the man he now was that stopped her. They didn't have the same easy familiarity of old and she didn't know where to start to get it back again. If they ever would.

"It's your choice, Ianto," Mam said, not surprised by his decision. "But I'll keep it for you, just in case. If you ever change your mind, just tell me."

"I won't."

Mam turned to Rhiannon. "I'm assuming you'll take yours."

"Yes, Mam. Thank you." She got up and hugged her before sitting down again.

"Good. Now that's settled, I'll need the two of you to say if there's anything in the house you want otherwise it'll be thrown away. I'm not taking any of this with me." Nerys' gaze went round the room, her distaste evident.

An hour later, Rhiannon left the house and walked slowly pushing the buggy. She had a lot to think about and was glad to find the flat still empty when she got home. Sitting beside David's cot as he shuffled around before settling to sleep, she decided to tell Johnny that she had inherited £10,000 keeping the rest in her own account for emergencies. It made her feel good to have that behind her but she still resented her tad for squirreling it away and not using it to make his family's lives happier. She didn't know what to make of her mam who had changed so much; in just a few days she'd become more assertive and independent, almost another woman. Pity she'd not been that way when it would have helped her kids. And Ianto was drawing away from them, hardly part of the family at all, and obviously not at all sorry to leave them behind.

She reached into her pocket and drew out her mobile, flicking to the pictures she had taken of him playing with David that evening. Would David see his uncle again after tomorrow or would Ianto go to London and forget all about his family in Wales?


	10. Moving On

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"The funeral was awful. Not because we were upset about Tad but because we weren't. I don't think there was anyone there who gave a damn about him, except maybe some of his drinking buddies." Rhiannon was unemotional. "It rained throughout too, like even the heavens were wanting to see the back of him."

Gwen didn't comment. Her opinion of Huw Jones was pretty low but it was still sad that he had not been mourned, everyone deserved that much. "I suppose Ianto went back to university."

"The next day. And we didn't see him again for over a year."

"I'm sorry."

"I missed him but I had plenty to keep me busy." She smiled and turned pages in the album until she found the one she wanted. "David was toddling and getting into mischief. Just look at him!" The photograph was of a small boy in jeans and T-shirt grubbing in the dirt. His clothes and face were dirty but he had a delighted grin on his face that made him look like his father. "That's one of the last we took in the garden of our flat. A few weeks later we moved into this place."

"Must have helped, having more room."

"We needed it. I was pregnant with Mica, see?" She pointed to another photograph taken in front of the house. Johnny was holding David with an arm round Rhiannon's shoulders. "That was the day we moved in, I was six months' gone."

Gwen smiled at the photograph. It was clear that Rhiannon's family was happy and that David was well-loved and cared for. That was what Gwen wanted for her own family. She wanted a house, and Rhys and her child safe and secure within it. Aliens may come again to Cardiff but she was not going to let them take away her security or her life. She had no idea if or how Torchwood would continue – she didn't believe Jack would ever want to return to it now Ianto was gone – or if she wanted to stay. It was a talk she and Rhys had been putting off for the past few days. They would have to address the issue soon.

"You okay?" asked Rhiannon softly.

"Yes. Just … well, wondering what my future's going to be." Gwen shook herself and forced a smile. "Rhys and I are looking for houses. Our flat barely holds us, it certainly won't cope with a baby!"

"Where are you looking?"

"All over. Penarth seems to be favourite at the moment." Unless they moved away completely, went far from Cardiff and its Rift.

"It's lovely there. Good schools too. David's doing well at his. Must have got Ianto's brains!"

"He likes school then?" The Cromwell Estate was not known for turning out scholars; petty thieves and layabouts were far more common.

"Loves it, so far. Johnny and me, we're encouraging him though it's hard when his friends aren't so bothered. I just want him to have as many opportunities as he can when he grows up. Same for Mica."

"I'm sure he'll make you proud."

"He'd better."

Rhiannon was fiercely determined that both her children would do well. She was happy with her own choices and wouldn't change anything but she wanted David and Mica to have good jobs and make something of themselves. And, surprisingly, so did Johnny. He was the middle child of three with an older brother and younger sister. His brother had been involved in a local gang until he bungled a deal and had to leave Wales or suffer the consequences. He hadn't been heard of for three years and no one knew where he was or even if he was still alive. Johnny sailed close to the wind from time to time but his brother's experience and his own marriage kept him on the right side of the law. He and Rhiannon were united in wanting to give their own children a good start.

"You'll feel the same," went on Rhiannon, "when yours is old enough. Just about every parent, even the worst of those round here, wants their kids to do better than them."

Gwen nodded. "You're right, I already want that. And did your mam move in the end?" Gwen was surprised when her innocent question elicited a furious retort.

"Oh yes! She moved all right. Twice."

Gwen waited but Rhiannon didn't add anything, staring stonily in front of her. After several minutes Gwen said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

"I'm the one who's sorry." Rhiannon shook herself as if letting go of her anger. "God, it still makes me so mad! Three months after Tad died, Mam was in her new flat. One of those swanky ones off The Hayes. Did everything on her own, she did, we only helped taking some of her stuff across. Once she was in, we rarely saw her. Then I found out why – she had a fancy man!"

"What?" Gwen was astounded, this didn't sound like the washed out and bullied woman she'd seen in the photographs and imagined from what Rhiannon had told her. "How did she manage to find someone so quickly?"

"She says there was nothing between them until after Tad died. Like I was going to believe that! Must have been seeing one another for years."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because it was only Roy bloody Traynor who she'd been working with since I was a kid. Lord know how long it'd been going on before she dropped the bombshell. Only getting married and moving away! Told us when Ianto came home to see Mica. Look at us!" She angrily turned pages until she reached a double page spread of photographs of the family, including Ianto. In the snaps everyone was happy and smiling. "We were so happy until she spoiled it all!"

Rhiannon stared at the images and remembered waiting for her brother to come home ...

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: Moving On, 2003_

The house was larger than their old flat, Rhiannon knew that, but found it hard to believe. Only four months after the family had moved in every room was overflowing with their belongings, even one month old Mica's room where she was at that moment. The baby was grizzly and she was trying to get her to quieten when really she should be downstairs sorting out the meal. It was three on Saturday afternoon and Johnny would be back from the station with Ianto soon and then David, who had gone with his father, would be under her feet.

"Come on, sweetheart," she said looking down at the bundle in her arms. "Go to sleep for Mummy."

The sound of a car stopping outside drew Rhiannon to the window and she saw Johnny getting out. Ianto emerged from the passenger door and stood looking round at the estate. He had filled out a bit since she'd last seen him and looked older than twenty. She realised that she was nervous about meeting him again. They hadn't met since their tad's funeral over a year before, a strained day for many reasons, and had spoken only occasionally on the phone. As she watched, Johnny let David out of the car seat and the boy started running around, obviously excited. Neither man seemed to be paying him much attention so Rhiannon quickly went downstairs and opened the front door.

"David, not in the road!" she called, balancing Mica against her shoulder. "Johnny, stop him!"

It was Ianto who saw what was needed and in half a dozen quick strides had captured the laughing boy and swung him up, tucking him under one arm. He was grinning as the pair approached Rhiannon. "Hey, Rhi. You've got a fast one here."

"I know, can't leave him alone for a minute. How are you, Ianto? It's good to see you." They hugged awkwardly, she holding the baby and Ianto with David wriggling to be free.

"And you. And this must be Mica." He had David upright in his arms now as he looked down at the baby. "Oh, she's a beauty."

"Baby," said David, poking her not unkindly. "She's loud."

"Yeah, she's a right little crier," added Johnny coming up to join them. He had Ianto's bag in one hand. "Where shall I put this then?"

"In the hall for now. Come on in," invited Rhiannon, leading the way indoors.

The three adults plus David, his toys and Mica's things made the open plan living room with a kitchen diner at one end seem very small. Rhiannon made drinks for them all and after a bit Johnny took David into the garden while Ianto sat on the sofa with Mica. Rhiannon sat in the chair opposite with her tea, finally able to have a quiet word with him.

"She has our nose," said Ianto with a smile, running a finger down the side of Mica's face.

"Yeah, she takes after our side all right. How are you, Ianto?"

"Good. It's hectic. Lots of studying in the final year." He sipped his coffee and smiled at her. "And plenty of parties too."

"And you're still working at the coffee shop?"

"Wouldn't be able to eat unless I did! But I would anyway, I like it. Lots of the guys hang out there to study." He jiggled Mica who was fussing a little until she stopped. "That's better. You've got to be on your best behaviour for Uncle Ianto, young lady," he told the baby.

Rhiannon watched the pair of them as Ianto continued to talk to Mica. He looked happy, she decided, content with his life even if it was busy. But then he was used to working hard.

"How's Mam?" he asked.

"All right. Don't see much of her, once a month or so. Strange that, would have thought she'd have wanted the company." And to see her grandchildren, she added silently; Johnny's mam, Jean, came round at least twice a week.

"She still at Asda?"

"Yeah, in the office. Oh, watch her." Rhiannon got up and grabbed a tissue, just in time to stop Mica's milky sick getting onto Ianto's shirt. "You okay with her? She can go in her basket otherwise."

"I'm fine. When I've finished my coffee I'll go and see David." Shouts could be heard from the garden where he and Johnny were playing with a ball. "He's a chatty lad, didn't stop going on about the trains."

Rhiannon returned to her seat leaving the tissues beside Ianto. "He loves 'em! There's something odd about Mam," she added thoughtfully, "you won't recognise her! Got a whole new wardrobe and dresses up all the time. Goes out too. Wears lots more makeup and Eleri - remember her? - she's seen Mam buying sexy underwear in one of the boutiques in town."

The latter concerned Rhiannon more than anything else about her mam's changed behaviour. Nerys Jones had always bought her underwear at M&S, practical stuff and not the least bit sexy. Why had she changed? At first she had wondered if it might be a present for herself, Rhiannon, but it had been perfume as usual for her last birthday. The underwear had never been mentioned.

"Good for her. About time Mam had a chance to enjoy herself." Ianto was still looking at Mica, marvelling at his little niece, so didn't see Rhiannon purse her lips in displeasure. "She's coming round for lunch tomorrow, that right?"

"Yeah. Just the four of us and the kids. I just hope the weather holds, it'll be a lot easier if David can run around outside."

"I'm sure it'll be fine. I have to leave by six." He looked over at her then. This was only a weekend visit to see Mica and catch up with the family. "Got lectures first thing Monday."

"I know. You'll be in Mica's room tonight on a put-u-up, if that's okay."

"Oh, going to bunking with little Mica, eh?" he joked, smiling down at her. "Won't we have fun?"

"We'll move her in with us." She stood up, gathering the empty coffee mugs and put them on the counter. Her mobile was lying nearby and she used it to take a snap of Ianto and the baby. "Now, I'd better start on dinner."

The rest of the day passed pleasantly. Rhiannon loved being a wife and mother and was a calm presence at the centre of a sometimes chaotic household. Today, Mica went down for a nap without fuss and David was happy running round with his father and uncle until he got over-excited. Ianto managed to calm him by reading stories. They had a lot of fun together making animal noises and Rhiannon stopped her work to take a snap of the two of them, catching them with their heads close together over the book. Later, she reluctantly let Ianto and Johnny give David a bath to the accompaniment of much laughter and what sounded like diving aircraft. Rhiannon paused while tidying up and listened to the pandemonium above her head with a smile, pleased the visit was going so well. Ianto was trying hard to fit in, with the kids and Johnny, and after dinner, with David in bed, the two men went to the pub. Rhiannon had just finished cleaning the bathroom and put her feet up when Ianto returned; he wasn't a great drinker and a little of Johnny's company went a long way. The siblings sat and chatted about old friends and old times and Rhiannon felt close to Ianto once more.

Sunday morning started just as pleasantly. With Johnny having a lie in, Rhiannon sorted out the children with Ianto's help and let him take David to the playground to burn off some of his seemingly inexhaustible energy. They returned at eleven and went with Johnny to collect Nerys Jones leaving Rhiannon busy with the lunch. As she sliced vegetables and checked the joint, always keeping an eye on baby Mica, Rhiannon hummed along with the radio. This was the family life she had craved as a child; parents who got along and children who were indulged a little but not to excess.

Life had been made easier by the money left by her tad. Most of it was still in the bank and earning good interest which gave her a bit extra when she needed it as well as allowing her some security. The rest had gone into the joint account and helped furnish the house when they managed to get it and ensured they could have a second child. Yes, life was good and she was looking forward to having her mam and Ianto see what she had made of her life. She may not have paper qualifications but she was secure and happy.

The others returned and entered the house noisily, waking Mica who had been sleeping in her basket on the sofa. Nerys Jones moved forward and reached for her. "All right if I take her, Rhi?" she asked already lifting Mica up. "Oh, she's so cute."

"Mam, you're looking well." At a glance Rhiannon had taken in the recently styled hair and well cut, wide leg trousers and satin shirt as well as the impeccable makeup. Nerys looked dressed more for a meal out at a fancy restaurant than lunch with the family. "David, no!" The boy was reaching for a biscuit.

"Come on, son, let's play ball." Johnny drew David outside, always happier doing something.

"Come watch me, Granny," said David, pulling on Nerys' hand.

"In a bit, love, I want to see your sister first."

"Take her with you, she could do with some air," suggested Rhiannon, watching as Nerys followed the beaming David. Ianto lingered. "See what I mean?" she said.

"Yeah, she looks a bit dolled up for lunch with us." He was in jeans and a shirt, the same as her and Johnny.

"She always is, must spend a packet on clothes. And she's out most nights, so I hear." Rhiannon moved to the window and watched Nerys standing with the baby in her arms. "She's okay with the kids when she's here but she doesn't come often."

"You done something to upset her?"

"No, I haven't!"

"Sorry. Anything I can do to help?"

"Go keep Johnny company. He and Mam don't get on that well."

"I can imagine. Better go and be grilled too, she's already started asking about uni." He rolled his eyes, grinned, pinched a biscuit and went outside.

Lunch was ready at one and everyone was getting on reasonably well. Rhiannon could see Ianto was irritated by Mam's persistent questions about his studies which he answered as briefly as he could. He preferred to keep his family separate from the rest of his life which Rhiannon accepted even though she neither understood nor liked it. To take the pressure off him, she tried a few other topics of conversation but nothing really worked. David was her best ally, at two years old he chatted constantly about all his doings. He also insisted on feeding himself which was the source of many chuckles among the adults as he carefully arranged his food on the plate before eating it.

Leaving the others to clear up, Rhiannon took David upstairs for a nap before returning to the living room and giving Mica her bottle. Johnny took himself off to clean the car – anything to get away from small talk – leaving the others.

"Mam showed me her apartment," said Ianto, slouched in a chair. "It's so handy for the shops."

"I feel really settled there now," replied Nerys Jones. "Took a bit of time but I'm glad I made the move." She smiled at them but there was something false in her manner that her children picked up on.

"What is it, Mam?" asked Rhiannon, moving Mica onto her shoulder so she could burp her.

Nerys smiled more genuinely. "I've got something to tell you both." She hesitated before saying, "I'm getting married."

Mica's burp was loud in the ensuing silence.

"You're what?" demanded Rhiannon for once ignoring her daughter. "You can't be getting married, you don't know anyone."

"Of course I do. I'm marrying Roy Traynor, from the supermarket."

"Him! Why?"

"Because we love one another. And don't take that attitude with me, Rhiannon. I'm a free woman and able to do what I want." Nerys' face was getting pink with indignation and her lips were set in a thin line.

"Is he the manager?" asked Ianto. "The tall guy?"

"Yes, dear, that's him. He's a very kind man and we've been going out for a few months now."

"Months!" exploded Rhiannon, putting Mica in her basket. "More like years! He's the one that came on that day out to Porthcawl and hung around us all the time. Now we know why. And I suppose that's why you got promoted over Beryl Jenkins, so you could do it with him in the office!"

"Rhi -" began Ianto, holding out a hand to calm her.

"Don't you Rhi me, Ianto Jones! This ... this tart has been having it off with that twat for years, I tell you!"

"How dare you! If you can't talk sensibly then I shall leave." Nerys stood up and gathered her handbag, her anger hiding the threatening tears.

"Mam, wait a minute." Ianto was also on his feet, his hand on her arm. "Let's be sensible and talk about this." His attempts to rescue the situation fell on deaf ears.

"This explains so much," continued Rhiannon, standing up too. "Why you needed a flat away from anyone who knew you. Why you hardly ever come to see your grandchildren. The new clothes and sexy knickers." She saw her mam start when she said the last. "Oh yes, I know about them too. Got them on now or do you save them for him?"

"Rhiannon, that's enough!" Ianto's voice cut over what she was going to say next. "Are you going to calm down so we can talk?"

"No I'm not. Get her out of my house." Rhiannon stared at her mam who stalked from the room, Ianto a step behind her.

Left alone Rhiannon reached for Mica who had picked up on the atmosphere and started to cry. Comforting her gave time for Rhiannon to recover her temper but she was still fuming. Her mam had been carrying on with a man. Her mam! It was unthinkable and wrong. Her mam! Rhiannon couldn't get over the fact that it was her mam acting in such a disgusting way. And while she was busy schmoozing with Roy bloody Traynor, she'd neglected her own family, her only grandchildren. Pacing up and down, Mica in her arms, Rhiannon didn't notice Ianto return until he was standing in front of her.

"What the hell's got into you?" he demanded keeping his voice low in deference to the baby and David sleeping upstairs.

"Didn't you hear her?" She stopped pacing. "Our mam has been ... spreading her legs for that idiot Traynor."

"Stop it. I'll not have you talking about Mam like that." His expression was stern and his gaze met hers unflinchingly. "Get Mica settled while I make some coffee then we'll talk. Johnny's taken Mam home."

He walked to the kitchen leaving Rhiannon standing in the middle of the room. She didn't know why but she followed his orders and when Mica was happy in her basket, Rhiannon joined him at the kitchen table.

"I see no reason for you to be getting so upset. Mam is perfectly free to see whoever she wants to and if she can be happy with someone -"

"Happy? What's that got to - "

"Shut up, Rhi. I don't want to hear another word until I've said my piece." He fixed her with a gimlet stare until she sulked but was quiet. "Like I said, she's a free woman. She's what, forty five? Forty six? She's young enough to marry again and get some years of happiness after all the crap she put up with from Tad. Roy Traynor is her choice and from what I remember of him he's all right. He'll never set the world on fire but he's respectable and got a good job. You should be happy for her." He was silent for a minute or two. "You can speak now."

"Thank you!" The sarcasm dripped from her voice. "He's after her money, there's no other reason for him to want her."

"What money? Most of what she had went on the flat. And he's single with a good job and money of his own."

"You don't know that! He's always appeared straightforward but he can't be, can he? Not when he's been carrying on with Mam all these years."

"Where have you got that from! There's no evidence that -"

"I don't need evidence! I know!" Rhiannon was still angry with her mam and was getting angry with Ianto too. He was so collected and calm when he should have been as mad as her about their mam's plans.

He sighed heavily. "What's this really about, Rhi?" he said gently. "It's not as if she has any reason to stay loyal to Tad. And we're independent and don't need her any more."

"Her grandchildren need her."

"Is that it? Mam has to give up companionship and happiness for the rest of her life because you want her to be a model grandma?" It was his turn to be sarcastic. "Frankly after your display this afternoon, I won't blame her if she does move away."

"Moves away?"

"Yes. Roy's been promoted to manage the new superstore at Newport, starts next month. He was going to commute from here but unless you make it up with her they'll be moving soon as they're married. You're driving her away, Rhi."

"Good riddance. She never wants to see me anyway." Rhiannon folded her arms and her face took on a stubborn look. "Same as you don't."

There was silence for several minutes. Rhiannon wondered if she had gone too far but her sense of outrage was too strong for her to back down. A cry from upstairs and footsteps on the landing told her David was awake. The gate at the top of the stairs would keep him safe but she didn't like leaving him unsupervised. Without a word, she got up and went to him.

"Mummy." David was still a bit sleepy as he gripped the bars of the gate looking through them at her coming up the stairs. He held up his arms.

"Come here, sweetheart," she said softly, lifting him into her arms and taking him back to the bedroom. She sank down on the bed and held his warm body close to her, rocking him back and forth. "How's Mummy's little boy?" She was changing David's nappy when she heard Johnny return and he and Ianto talking. Then Johnny was thumping up the stairs calling her name. She didn't answer, he'd find her soon enough.

"There you are. You all right, Rhi?"

"Yeah."

"What's going on? First your mam leaves and now Ianto wants to go too." It was hours before he had planned to leave.

"We had a row. I'll tell you about it later, okay?" She went on with what she was doing then stopped. "Johnny, finish this while I take Ianto. You look after the kids." She stepped aside leaving Johnny to redress David and went downstairs. Ianto was in the living room with his bag, smiling down at Mica. "I'll drive you," she told him.

They completed the ten minute journey in silence. Rhiannon wanted to mend fences with her brother but didn't know where to start and he didn't seem inclined to help her. It wasn't until they were stopped in the station forecourt that she managed to find any words.

"I didn't mean to snap at you," she said. "Sorry. Text me when you're home."

"All right." He paused then added politely, "Thanks for putting me up. I've enjoying seeing you and the kids."

"We've enjoyed having you." It was true. He had been a perfect guest and if only her mam hadn't spoiled everything they'd be parting on better terms.

Ianto hesitated, hand on the door handle, then said, "Please talk to Mam. Give her a chance to explain."

Rhiannon's hands gripped the steering wheel and she stared straight ahead. "I'll never forgive her, Ianto. Not for cutting herself off from us like this."

"Rhi, you're the one cutting her out of your life." He pecked her on the cheek and got out of the vehicle and was quickly gone into the station.

Rhiannon drove home wondering exactly why her mam's news had provoked such a strong reaction in her. It was a long time before she began to understand.


	11. London

**Rhiannon's Story**

_Gwen and Rhiannon_

"Mam married him three months later and they moved to Newport." Rhiannon's face was stony and for the first time she resembled her tad. "See her about twice a year now."

Gwen said nothing, surprised at the animosity shown by Rhiannon towards her mam's second marriage. It seemed out of all proportion and unlike the woman she had come to know as they'd looked through the photograph album. If it had been a mother-in-law Gwen would have understood better, having had problems with Brenda Williams for years.

"I suppose you're wondering why I was so angry. Am still angry," Rhiannon amended with a small smile and a sigh.

"A bit."

"I couldn't have told you back then, it was just a gut reaction. No one expects their mam to start dating. But later on, when I had a chance to think about it, I realised it was because with Roy Traynor sniffing after her – and he'd been interested for years, he told me as much - she could have left Tad when we were kids. Roy would have been a better father to us than Tad ever was. But instead she stayed in that miserable marriage and made us all suffer."

"Perhaps she wasn't sure how strong this other man's feelings were," she ventured. "When I was with the police, I came across too many women who were trapped in a loveless – and often abusive – marriage but who wouldn't or couldn't leave. They made themselves believe it was their fault and that they had to stay, especially for their children, that there was no alternative."

"Mam had options, and she knew it. She wasn't a fool!"

"Maybe not but it's still a very difficult thing to leave your husband."

Rhiannon did not look convinced. "It could have all been different," she said stubbornly.

Deciding not to argue, Gwen went back to the photo album. It would soon be time for her to go; she liked being home when Rhys got in. Her chat with Rhiannon had given her an insight into the Jones family and especially into how the children had been affected by their upbringing: Ianto had distanced himself completely and rewritten his childhood; Rhiannon had cut herself off from her mam. They had both been damaged.

"Stop there," said Rhiannon, putting out a hand to the album. She was smiling, putting all thoughts of her mam behind her. "See that? That was one of the best days Ianto and I ever had."

There were four photographs that had attracted her attention. The first two were of Ianto and David – looking cute in a hat – engrossed in a dinosaur exhibit at a museum, the next was of Ianto, David and Lisa Hallett posed in front of a wall and the last one of Rhiannon, David and Ianto in the same place. They were all smiling and happy.

"Those were taken when Ianto was still in London, when David was just five." Rhiannon remembered the day well ...

-ooOoo-

_Rhiannon: London, 2006_

"Are we there yet?"

"Almost. Another ten minutes." Rhiannon smiled down at David who was kneeling on the seat with his hands on the train window looking out at the grimy landscape of suburban London. He was so excited and she was enjoying having him all to herself for the day. "You'd better gather up your crayons and cars."

"Mustn't lose them," he agreed with a serious expression, turning to face the table again.

Between them they retrieved the crayons, colouring book and toy cars that had kept him occupied throughout most of the two and a quarter hour journey, helped by the woman who had sat opposite for most of that time and who had been understanding when David's chatter had seemed unending. The toys went into his backpack which he kept beside him, eager for the next part of his special day. Rhiannon put the half-eaten packet of biscuits in her shoulder bag and sat back, content to watch David as he enthused about the passing trains.

It had been Johnny's idea for her to take David out for the day, just the two of them. She had been getting a bit silly about the boy starting school, wanting to hold onto him and not let him out into the wider world. It was absolutely ridiculous, she knew that, but she still didn't want to admit that her baby was growing up. There had been no problem deciding where to take him. The boy was mad on dinosaurs and trains in equal measure so a train trip to London to visit the Natural History Museum was his ideal day out. When she'd mentioned the idea to Ianto, in their monthly phone call, he had offered to show them round and to introduce her to Lisa. So that morning she had left three year old Mica with Johnny's mam and set out with David on the 8.55 happy to be with her son and keen to meet Lisa, Ianto's girlfriend of six months.

"We're here, Mam, we're here!" announced David to the entire carriage as the train pulled into Paddington station. "We've got to get off." He starting pushing at her; she had wisely sat in the aisle seat and trapped him by the window.

"When the train stops! Sit still for a minute more."

A few minutes later they walked off the train and, after getting his backpack straight – he was very proud of carrying his own things - and her own bag comfortably on her shoulder, she took his hand and they followed the other passengers down the long platform to the barrier. Once through she kept an even tighter grip on him as people swirled around them. And then she saw Ianto waiting to one side.

"Rhi, you made it." He came up to her side and hugged her briefly before giving in to David's entreaties and picking him up. "Wow, you're a really big boy now."

"I'm going to school soon," he said proudly.

For a moment, Rhiannon had a flashback to Ianto saying the same thing, in the garden of their old home, when he was the same age. Where had the years gone? Ianto was now a strikingly handsome six-footer and a civil servant working in London.

"Rhi? You all right?" Ianto had put David down and was looking at his sister curiously while holding David and the hand of a pretty, dark skinned girl who was smiling at her.

"Sorry, wool gathering. You must be Lisa," she said quickly.

"That's right. Lovely to meet you, Rhiannon. That's a fabulous name." Lisa continued to smile, crouching down to say hello to David.

"Let's get out of here," said Ianto, leading them across the station concourse. "Want to go on the underground, Dai?"

"Oh yes, Uncle Ianto!" The boy trotted along happily at Ianto's side, holding onto his hand and asking questions about the underground.

This left Rhiannon to follow behind with Lisa. The two women chatted, mainly about the journey and David, but Rhiannon felt lumpish and old-fashioned beside the slim and stylishly dressed Lisa. Two children had not done a lot for Rhiannon's figure but most of the time she was with other mothers who suffered the same problem and could ignore it. Now she realised how much she had let herself go. Luckily conversation was interrupted when they went down the escalator – David had insisted on holding his mother's hand – and they were all together as they got tickets and went down another escalator to the platform.

"Come here, love," said Rhiannon, pulling David to the curving back wall and rummaging in her bag. "There's lots of people and I think we should make sure we don't lose one another." She slipped one end of the strap over his wrist and the other on hers so he couldn't run off. "That's better."

"Train's coming. Can you hear it?" said Lisa, holding David's other hand.

"It's windy," he replied marvelling.

"It certainly is. Which way do you think it'll come?"

"That way." He released her hand and pointed to the left just as lights appeared and the train whooshed into the station. "Whoa!"

They got two seats together; Rhiannon took David on her knee and Lisa had the other seat while Ianto stood. David was enthralled and content to sit still which was lucky as the press of people meant he couldn't run around. All too soon for him they arrived at South Kensington station and walked through the subway to the museum. On the walk, Rhiannon had a chance to observe Ianto and Lisa and realised he was happy with her. She bossed him around a bit but he didn't seem to mind and, as Rhiannon knew well, he was stubborn and wouldn't do anything he didn't want to do. They worked together, Rhiannon knew that much, but Ianto had been very cagey about his new job. All she knew was that it was based in Docklands and that he had got a tiny flat nearby. It was mysterious but not unusual; Ianto had not shared details of his life with her for years even though they got on well enough when they met.

The museum was nicely busy when they arrived just before midday. David was ecstatic when Ianto hired an Explorer Backpack for him, wearing the pith helmet proudly with the binoculars hanging round his neck. Leaving their other bags in the cloakroom, they headed to the café where Lisa and David got a table while Rhiannon and Ianto went to the counter.

"He's a great kid," said Ianto as they stood in the queue.

"He reminds me of you. And thanks for getting that Explorer thingy for him, though I'm not sure he'll want to give it back."

"If he likes it that much, I'll buy it for him."

"I can't let you do that. It's too much."

"Rubbish! If I lived nearer I'd treat him to lots of stuff. Do you want coffee or tea?"

"Coffee." With a selection of sandwiches, some crisps and drinks, they made for the table where the others were waiting.

David had the binoculars glued to his eyes. "I could see you all the way over there, Mam. Right to the corner." He was grinning and accepted the plastic cup of fizzy drink she handed him.

"Won't be able to hide anything from you," laughed Lisa. "You'll see everything we do."

"Yes, I will!" He drank noisily. "Mam, we will see dinosaurs, won't we?"

"Of course," answered Ianto, studying the museum plan. "We'll go there after lunch and then I think the mammals gallery. There's a Blue Whale there."

"But I will see the dinosaurs?" persisted David. "I may want to spend a long time looking at them."

"You can spend as long as you want, sweetheart." Rhiannon pushed the pith helmet back; it was a bit large and fell over his eyes. "Eat your sandwich. It's egg, your favourite." She pushed it towards him.

"I didn't realise there was so much here," said Ianto, still studying the plan as he sipped his drink. "There's masses to see."

"You must have been here before," said Lisa with a laugh. "Every schoolkid in the UK comes here at least once."

"Not us."

Rhiannon saw Ianto's face close up. There had been a school trip when they were in the juniors but Tad had refused to pay and Mam had not had any money to spare. It had been one of Ianto's biggest disappointments as he'd been almost as mad about dinosaurs as David. They'd been one of only a handful not to go and had spent the day at the Museum of Wales with the very youngest year instead.

"We did go to the museum in Cardiff," put in Rhiannon to fill up the awkward gap. "It had a lot of good things to see."

"But not dinosaurs like this," added Ianto morosely.

"Don't worry, Uncle Ianto, you can see them today," piped up David, a ring of orange round his mouth.

Ianto looked up and a grin spread over his face. "So I can. I knew there was a reason why nephews were invented. It's so uncles get a chance to do all the cool things they missed. Better eat fast so we can go and explore."

That was all the encouragement David needed and he started to eat as fast he could and nearly choked as a result. Having slapped him on the back a few times, he was okay again and Rhiannon turned her attention to the two sitting opposite.

"So, tell me more about your work. Which bit of the government do you work for?"

Ianto looked shifty and wouldn't meet her eyes but Lisa smiled and answered for them both. "A boring one. Nothing happens, Rhiannon, honestly. I'm in HR and move people around from one section to another while Ianto is locked away in the basement with the files. But it pays reasonably well and it's not too demanding. I like it."

"And you, Ianto?"

"I like it too," he replied. "And I'm not in a basement. The archives are on the third floor so I do see daylight."

Rhiannon waited but neither of them said any more which seemed strange. If they liked their jobs so much surely they'd want to talk about them. Lisa seemed the type who'd like to brag about her achievements especially to one of Ianto's family. Rhiannon was not sure she liked Lisa. It wasn't just the slim body and good looks, Rhiannon could accept she was never going to look as good as that again (if she ever had), it was … a slyness in her manner. But watching Ianto, she saw he was smitten and probably couldn't see her faults. He must be serious about her, he wouldn't have brought her along today otherwise.

Eventually they finished their meal and David hustled them out to the museum proper. He and Ianto took the lead, David looking cute in his hat and red backpack, and were both delighted with the dinosaur gallery. Staying a little apart, Rhiannon watched as Ianto and David marvelled over an animated Tyrannosaurus Rex that roared at them and discussed the finer points of a Triceratops comparing it to the Pteranodon 'flying' above them. She took a couple of snaps of them, more interested in their reactions than the displays although she liked the hatching area with eggs and little dinosaurs emerging from shells. Lisa got bored after a while and maybe a little jealous – Ianto was paying more attention to David than to her - and Rhiannon worked hard to keep her sweet taking a few more snaps. They all enjoyed the mammals gallery and they had fun trying to make whale noises.

They continued walking through the exhibits and when Lisa put her arm through Ianto's and drew him off to look at a display, Rhiannon stayed close to David to give the others time alone. With David using a computer display to see pictures of insects, she looked over and decided Lisa was trying to persuade Ianto to leave. Rhiannon didn't blame her but she was sorry it would cut short Ianto's time with his nephew, they'd been getting on so well together.

"Rhi, Lisa's got to go." Ianto looked apologetic.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. It's been lovely to meet you." Rhiannon smiled brightly. "Maybe Ianto'll bring you down to Cardiff some time, you'd always be welcome."

"I'd like that," replied Lisa with an answering smile. "Bye, David. Bye, Rhiannon. Call me, Ianto." She leant forward and kissed Ianto lightly on the lips and with a wave walked off through the crowd.

"If you want to go as well …" started Rhiannon, surprised Ianto was staying.

"No, she can get home all right. There's lots more I want to see here." He smiled at her before joining David at the computer screen. "What's that you're doing, Dai?"

The three of them spent another hour walking round until gone four o'clock and it was time to think of leaving. David begged to go back to the dinosaurs and neither of them could refuse him – he had been well-behaved all day - so they had one last leisurely walk through the dinosaur gallery, ending in the huge central hall with the complete skeleton. David was tiring by now and they sat on a bench while he checked out the skeleton with his binoculars.

"I'd better be getting this one to the train," said Rhiannon, her arm round David as he leant against her. "He can sleep on the way home."

"Do you have to go so soon? I was hoping we could have a meal," said Ianto. "My treat."

"That's kind but I know my son." She pulled a face. "In another hour or so he'll be grumpy and out of sorts if he doesn't get some quiet time. It's been a long day for him."

Ianto looked down at David, who had his thumb in his mouth and his eyes half-closed, and realised she was right. "Guess so. Shall we make a move then?"

"Yeah. Come on, David, time to leave."

It was a sign of his tiredness that the boy only made a token protest before taking his mother's hand. They retrieved their bags from the cloakroom and visited the shop for dinosaur toys and a large poster as well as a stuffed monkey for Mica. David was reluctant to be parted from his Explorer Backpack so Ianto bought that for him too and the boy happily walked out of the museum, between his mother and uncle, with the pith helmet still on his head. David managed the walk to the underground and revived a bit for the journey but was flagging again when they reached Paddington. Ianto picked him up and carried him out onto the station concourse, the boy's head resting on his shoulder.

"Next train's another thirty minutes," said Ianto, looking at the departures board.

"I'll just get a couple of bottles of water, for the journey. Are you all right with him?" Rhiannon smiled at the pair of them; Ianto would make a great dad someday.

"Yeah. We'll be over there." He nodded towards a bank of metal seats.

Coming back with her purchases, Rhiannon settled on the seat next to Ianto and checked her son. "He's asleep," she said. "You know I'll never be able to get this off him." She indicated the pith helmet. "He'll be wearing it for days."

"Sorry about that," he said but didn't look it. "Are you going to be able to manage on the train?"

"'Cos I will. Thanks for a lovely day, Ianto. It's been lovely to see you. I'm just sorry we didn't get a chance to have a chat."

"Me too." They were silent a moment. "What did you think of Lisa?"

Rhiannon picked her words with care. "I didn't get much of a chance to chat with her either, and I'm sorry she had to leave early, but I liked her."

He raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"All right, she made me feel old and fat! But I can forgive her that. I can see you like her a lot. Is it serious?" Ianto had mentioned only a few girlfriends during his time at university and later in London, and she had met none of them until Lisa.

"Yes, I think it is," he said slowly with a smile.

"Then bring her down sometime so I get to know her better. I'll keep Johnny in order, don't worry, and you don't have to see Mam if you don't want to, I hardly do." Rhiannon bit her lip to stop herself saying any more and spoiling the day; she and Ianto continued to disagree about their mam's remarriage. "Do come."

"I'll try. One weekend maybe."

"That'd be great. David would love to see you again. And there's Mica, you haven't seen her for ages."

"Okay! I'll do my best," he laughed before becoming serious. "I was wrong, all those years ago, you're made for marriage and motherhood. I'm sorry I was such a twat."

Rhiannon put her hand on his arm. "You were looking out for me so there's nothing to apologise for. Is your life what you wanted? Are you happy?" She watched him closely, finding it hard to read him.

"Yes, I am. It's a good job and Lisa's fun. Bit bossy but I don't mind that." He grinned boyishly. "We're planning a trip to France soon. Camping!"

"You? In a tent?" She threw back her head and laughed. "But where will you hang your clothes?"

"Hey, I'm not that bad," he protested, joining in the laughter. "She makes me try new things, stops me getting too stuffy."

"I'm liking her more and more." She sighed. "I wish we had more time, Ianto, I miss you."

"I miss you too, Rhi. I promise I'll come down, soon."

"I'm going to keep you to that!" She poked his arm. "Now, best wake up the little explorer so we can get him to the train."

They walked the half-awake David to the platform where the train was waiting, parting at the barrier with hugs and kisses. Ianto was still there when Rhiannon found a suitable carriage and, with a final wave to her brother, she ushered David on board. Five minutes later the train pulled out and David watched out of the window until he couldn't fight off sleep any longer and curled up on the seat.

Rhiannon settled back to watch the passing landscape and thought back over the day, recalling all the many pleasurable moments. It had been wonderful to see Ianto so happy and she determined to get to know Lisa better as it looked like she could become her sister-in-law. It had worked out for him, he had got away from the unhappiness of their upbringing and made a good life for himself. As had Rhiannon. She may have remained close to her roots but her family was very different from the one she had grown up in. Both she and Ianto had achieved their goals in their different ways. It was time to reap the rewards and share an adult friendship.

-ooOoo-

_Gwen_

Gwen waved to Rhiannon as she drove away and then concentrated on her driving.

The afternoon had explained so much about Ianto. He had endured a hard childhood and adolescence and worked his socks off to get a degree and a good job. He had established a level of understanding with Rhiannon and found love with Lisa. And then, just when things were going right for him, it had been destroyed at the Battle of Canary Wharf. No wonder he had been withdrawn and secretive at Torchwood Three until finding love with Jack. Even that had not been simple; how could loving an immortal time travelling flirt ever be easy? And this last happiness had been short-lived too.

Gwen regretted not understanding Ianto better while he was alive. There was nothing she could do about that now and so she resolved to try and help Rhiannon and Jack through this difficult time because, she was confident, that's what Ianto would have wanted.

* * *

_And there we leave them. Many thanks to all of you who have read the story. I hope you enjoyed it - Jay._


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